It’s been two weeks now since Benjamin’s father has seen his son.
His car is broken down because he drove it without oil. Sigh.
Coincidentally Benjamin has also been sick, sick, sick. I have missed four days of work and will be missing two more. I am also broke because I’ve had to pay for an extra two days of childcare each week.
I called him today en route to the hospital today. Benjamin had a fever of 104.5 and I thought he should know about it.
“Oh,” he says, “Well, I’m in a meeting, I’ll call you back.” CLICK.
I called him tonight to vent a bit. I know, I know. Should have let it go. He’s completely out of our lives now but when I’m missing days upon days of work and he doesn’t even seem concerned or offer to take a day off from his job I get upset.
“I understand,” he says.
“No you don’t.” I snap. “You don’t understand. How could you understand? You have never, ever had to take a day off from work to take care of your son when he’s sick.”
What he says next blew my mind.
“If we were married I would. But, my boss is not going to give me a day off to take care of my ex-wife’s kid. We are not a family anymore.”
“What?!!! He’s your son. You mean he is less of a son to you because we’re not married? Your boss can’t think that unless you think that.”
I should have hung up at this point but I didn’t. And then he drops this bomb (not the first time).
“It was your choice to leave me,” he says, “it was your choice and now you have to deal with it.”
Was it really my choice to be a single mom? Yes, in that the idea of actually still being with him, had I stayed, makes my skin crawl. Being a single mom is tough but being with a husband like him was a hell of a lot harder. He was cold, insensitive, hurtful and down right useless.
He’s now on month 9 of a relationship with another single mother. Her son is 6 and they’re now living together. Poor her. Poor kid.
If he would have had it his way, right now he would be sitting on MY couch, drinking MY beer, eating MY groceries and treating me like shit. I just wish he weren’t on another single mom’s couch right now. I wish I could warn her.
Conclusion = It was his choice to give me no choice.
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