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Haunted Bedford?

mssinglemama — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 23:30:58 +0000

Remember how I mentioned John Bear being a bit “creeped out” when we arrived at our bed and breakast in Bedford, PA.

Hope you enjoy.

And do me a favor… if you live in New York City (and don’t hate me) please spread the word about this event for single women. Sherri at Single Edition is putting it on and wanted me to make mention. Live the Life You Love will be held in the Saks Fifth Avenue shoe department in New York City on September 15th, October 6th and November 3rd. Sounds cool:

This three part, women’s only, lifestyle series will consist of cocktails, connections and conversations with a panel of trusted, leading experts. Each seminar offers insight, innovative tips and creative ideas to help you succeed at work, home and in your community.

I wish I could be there but alas, I will be hiding in my sweet little Ohio city for fear of you crazy New Yorkers trampling my tourist butt.

Win a Copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored!

Do me another favor, tweet this post with this [RT to win. What is scarier? Bedford PA or talking about morning thunder in front of @mssinglemama? http://tinyurl.com/mpkl6d] and you’ll automatically be entered to win a copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored, or you can just leave a comment.

Lots of prizes in the cue… I will announce the winners to all of these contests next Friday.

Single and Fabulous (?)

mssinglemama — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 11:02:53 +0000

I am single.

And I like to think I am fabulous.

But what if I’m not?

I’m not digging for compliments here. I’m just trying to explore something so bear with me…

My wrinkles are ever so subtly beginning to take over my forehead, my eyebrows are even falling, my gray hair is multiplying at an extraordinary pace, it’s a struggle to stay out later than 11:00 and I am about to turn 30.

And yes, I’m 100% single.

But I feel fabulous.

In fact, I can’t remember the last time I’ve been so content and completely happy. I credit a combination of factors:

The no man thing. Not having a boyfriend, or even anyone to date, frees up a lot of time and gives me all kinds of fabulous mental space to float around in. Plus I am clearly awful at choosing them. Instead, as of late, I’ve decided to let one choose me. I am throwing in my frequent man shopper card and moving into the slow lane for a while. Done and done.
Not smoking. It’s been 37 days, cold turkey. Not smoking, not even cheating, has made me feel like I can conquer anything. And I have this incredible amount of energy. It’s absolutely amazing.
Mr. Benjamin. He’s growing by leaps and bounds every day and he’s talking and talking and talking. Suddenly I have a roommate, someone to converse with, someone to play games with and even just hang out with. I’ve never had to potty train a roommate before, but – meh – no one is perfect. By the way, my friend Morgan took THE funniest picture of Lucca (Benjamin’s soul twin) potty training and turned it into a poster. Check it out.
A passion for my career. I love what I do. Every day. 100% of the time.

But does that mean I’m fabulous?

Maybe I’m just smoking some kind of single moms are awesome pipe and everyone is really laughing at me. But here’s the deal. You are only fabulous if you think you’re fabulous. Logic wins every time. And beauty comes from within.

But beauty sleep helps a lot too.

Last night I looked in the mirror and saw a tired, very non-fabulous me staring back. The night before I’d had one too many shots of tequila with my single girlfriends and the results were not pretty.

Hangover face is the worst.

Suddenly I had visions of my photo shoot this Friday — did I even tell you I have a photo shoot?. A local magazine thinks I’m one of the Top 10 Singles in the City and they have to take pictures to prove it.

So back to my photo shoot vision.

It went something like this.

The shoot is in just about 24 hours.

I’m freaking out (slightly) because I don’t know how to stare into a camera and look sexy. My solution, at this point, is to just sit there and pick my nose like Benjamin would.

Now that would be fabulous.

Ms. Single Mama, the three-year-old wanna be.

Sounds about right.

———————

So guess who is about to be married and fabulous???

Mommy Pie!!!!

You are NOT going to believe this but her man proposed to her with a blog post. The single mom bloggers are dropping like flies. Morgan. Now Mommy Pie.

Who’s next?

The man in the kitchen.

mssinglemama — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 20:10:41 +0000

My ex-husband has a little problem. He won’t let his girlfriend’s 7-year-old son call him Dad. As a result, our son, who he has for just 36 hours a week is now calling him by his first name too. He’s mimicking his psuedo step-brother. So what’s a jerky ex-husband to do?

“Why don’t you just let him call you Daddy?” I press, “He’s just a kid and you’re living with him.”

“He can call me Daddy if I’ve been there for five years, but not yet. I am not his father. He knows that.”

He’s walking around my kitchen – making coffee, grabbing snacks – pretending like its all his. The rant continues. His indifference to the children’s feelings is disgusting me. I escape to head upstairs where his girlfriend and her son are playing with Benjamin. We’d just met for the first time a few minutes ago.

She is standing over the boys who are completely immersed in the Thomas the Train set. She looks tired and run down, her wrinkles too deep for her age, her spirit vanquished and broken. After she became a single mom she started stripping and now, three years later she works at a Taco Bell. But despite our socioeconomic differences she and I are one in the same. We’ve both fallen in love with the man in the kitchen, a French-Canadian with a scarred past that’s left him unable to really love anyone, child or adult.

I can tell immediately that she doesn’t have my strength. He’s probably walking all over her – treating her like he wanted to treat me. But she has a son. I left our marriage just to avoid what she’s going through now.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” I say softly. I can tell she’s nervous. Who knows what he’s told her about me. ”So is he treating you well?” I ask. I don’t wait or beat around the bush. I know we don’t have much time and I’m concerned.

“He’s an asshole sometimes but for the most part he’s okay…I guess.”

“Well, I really hope you two are a better match than we were. But if he ever treats you badly don’t let him get away with it, okay?” And then I add, “Us single moms have to stick together, that’s all.”

For the first time she looks me in the eye and then she smiles. “Yeah – we do, don’t we?” The single motherhood code, an unspoken bond. We start sharing single mom war stories and then my ex breaks it up.

“We’ve got to go!”

They climb into his beat up Chevy cavalier. She sinks into the front seat. Then he stops and jumps out. “Do you have any Tylenol?”

“Yeah sure,” I hand him the pills.

He’s shaking his head, “That’s the thing with her, she pops 10 of these a day.”

What a jerk.

What if Benjamin turns out anything like his father? And why do I feel like I want to save her and her son? I know I can’t … can I? But moreover, after this experience and some other things too personal to write I’m wondering lately if Benjamin would be better off without his father in the picture at all.

Related posts you might like:

Caught on Tape: My ex, his girlfriend and my son? Nope. He’s just crying in the background.

Should I Leave My Husband?

Was it Really My Choice?

O’ Daddy Where Art Thou?

Nerds make better lovers.

mssinglemama — Sun, 20 Jan 2008 03:35:56 +0000

The founder of Craigslist.com, Craig Newmark, says it often in interviews…”nerds make better lovers.” When I first read this I giggled to myself because I have been happily dating nerds now since becoming a single mother. Since switching to nerds the cool, suave guys don’t even phase me anymore. This is coming from a woman who used to date the hottest, slickest guys out there.

So with that said…here’s why nerds make better lovers:

It’s all about you…all of the time. Nerds always, always make sure you’re satisfied. Can’t emphasize this one enough. Why? Because if a man doesn’t take the time to satisfy you in bed do you really think he’ll take the time to satisfy you outside of bed?
They aren’t afraid to show their sensitive side.
They don’t care what people think about them – they’re confident in who they are.
They’re smart and determined.
Did I already mention that you will be completely satisfied? Yep. Completely.
To them – you are a queen.
They’re hilarious.
They have nice friends.
They won’t jerk you over.
If you have a son – who would you rather him be when he grows up? A suave, ladies man or a super sweet, super smart nerd?
Enough said.

I haven’t completely eliminated the slick guys. I did go out on a few dates with some and actually made the mistake of dating one for a few weeks this summer…it had me running back to the nerds faster than you can say “single mama.”

So for all of the single moms (and single childless women) out there I feel obligated to spread the word…in hopes that you too will open your eyes and start checking out those geeky guys at Barnes and Noble. Underneath those Clark Kent exteriors just might lie an incredibly gorgeous Superman. One thing is true about men – you may not be able to change what’s inside but you can always change the outside.

For example, I made sure my favorite nerd ever (my boyfriend, Kris) went to a fantastic hair stylist for his latest cut … and poof! My nerd was instantly hotified. He’s actually a super hot nerd, in my opinion…think Clark Kent meets Cary Grant. But I think most women would overlook him because of his odd, quirky and overall nerdy nature. Lucky me!

I am actually a nerd … way back before I grew into my big ears and huge hands boys never gave me the time of day. Now…after all of these years of trying to deny my inner nerd I’m wondering why I caved so quickly once all of those jerks started noticing me. Nerds are SO much better.

If you haven’t, please, give a nerd a chance. If you already have…do share.

(picture courtesy of PatFullerton.com)

Do men really care if you’re a single mom?