Posts tagged as:

single mom in love

Hold up

by mssinglemama on July 15, 2009

There have been a few comments to my latest post from single mothers who are now unable to relate to my story, once feeling a connection that is now lost because I have fallen in love.

As Fame Jane put it, “I’ve been reading your blog since last summer (though I just started posting) and I used to feel like I had so much in common with you and your other readers – like we could all relate to each other so much, and now I’m starting not to feel that connection as much. It seems like the blog is becoming less about the struggles of singlemomhood, and more about a love story.”

She goes on to say she is happy for us, “it’s wonderful, absolutely wonderful and I am so happy for you. I’ve decided to use your story as one of hope and inspiration.”

That’s fantastic and my goal in all of this is exactly that, to hopefully inspire single moms or just make you all smile or laugh. I just really hope none of you think John Bear, Benjamin and I are sitting on a big, fat pile of roses making merry and galloping off into the sunset. Maybe I have been writing too much about all of the good stuff and not focusing enough on the real trials and tribulations of falling in love as a single mom. I can’t tell you everything but I can tell you that this shit has never been easy and it still isn’t. Being a single mother for three years and then suddenly bringing a man into the picture again is definitely not simple. Anyone who tells you it is has got to be selling you a bill of goods or sucking down happy pills every day. [click to continue…]

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A Single Mom, Madly in Love

by mssinglemama on August 20, 2008

My dearest blogging friend, Morgan (aka Modern Single Momma) – the co-founder of iHeartSingleParents.com – has fallen madly in love. When she first told me about her Man in Moseley I was skeptical, the voice of rational reason and then I saw these pictures of the two of them together and got tingles down my spine. This is the real deal… and I couldn’t be happier for her.

I am nuts in love.

By Morgan Siler

Couldn’t have planned for it in a million years. Same for becoming a single mom… once again proving the best things in life come entirely unexpected.

What can I say about love? For the past month and a half I have been wonderfully in it– simultaneously lost and keenly aware, like the greatest lucid dream ever experienced. My brain is still mush from my trip to visit my Man in Moselely.

There is a reason why love is such a popular topic. It’s the one thing deep down we all get, the one thing we can all nod our heads in agreement and say, “Yep, greatest drug known to man!” Love in and of itself, is nothing but awesome. A relationship may sour, but love never does. We are never hurt by love, we are hurt by the lack of it.

The thing about love though, is that it is also at the center of some of the most trite pieces of advice ever uttered. Writing about it I really wanted to avoid the triteness, especially because the experience of falling in love is so sacred; for me personally, not since the birth of my son have I felt life so alive.

I wanted to be able to share something with you all that was novel and inspiring. However, after days of reflecting on my experience, I have only the same damn trite things to say… and as much as I tried to avoid it, I am going to repeat them, because well, they are actually worth repeating.

So here they are the three of the tritest things about love (that aren’t so trite anymore):

1. You have to love yourself first

When I first found out I was pregnant and knew I would be going the road alone, I was at a very uncertain and difficult time in my life. I did not love myself much at all. I could go into gruesome detail here, but I will spare you (and myself). Its enough to say I knew I had some major personal work to do. If I was going to be responsible for the care of another soul here on this planet, I would have to get down to business facing some mighty demons. [click to continue…]

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Fall at your own risk.

by mssinglemama on July 28, 2008

Just a warning to any of my current or potential suitors.

I love you all, I do – but I’m not sure if you’ll get me in the end… because I am not sure about what I’m feeling, I can’t be. I have a son. I have to be very, very careful with my heart. I hope you can understand that and I’ll be as honest as I can. Always, you can count on my honesty.

And to my single mamas, men can definitely fall in love with us – just like they would fall for a single, childless woman. The reality on the other end is different, but that’s another story for another post.

But what about us? What does falling in love as a single mom feel like?

I’ve theorized that it will never really feel the same. If that’s true than what does it feel like? I’m tossing this to the veterans, the now married ex-single moms, or those of you who have really, truly fallen since becoming a single mom.

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