Why is Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love $14.95, that seems expensive for a PDF?

It took months of writing and a lot of money to bring you this eBook. Outside of my own time I also hired a graphic designer and a copyeditor. It’s not just a PDF, it’s a professional quality book.

Are you legally allowed to publish the story about Mr. Man?

Yes, I even consulted with a lawyer about sharing the Mr. Man story. I also called Mr. Man to get his approval.

Why can’t you just give it to me for free?

I quit my day job two months ago. This is now my full-time job. If I don’t sell enough of these eBooks I will not be blogging nearly as much, as I’ll have to start focusing on an alternative source of income. Giving it to you for free, unfortunately, isn’t an option because I still have to pay for things like food, shelter and clothing.

Can I buy the eBook and share it with a friend?

You can, but that would technically be illegal and not very nice of you.

What is an eBook?

An eBook is a book, online. Seconds after you buy it you’ll receive an e-mail with a link to your copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored, which, once you click it, will download a PDF of the book onto your desktop. Then you can print it or read it on your computer. If reading on a computer bothers your eyes, read it in daily doses like you do my blog (although that may be tough because so far those who have read it say they can’t put the sucker down). Read a preview of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored for free here.

How do I buy the eBook, I’m still confused.

Click here and you’ll be taken to a PayPal page. If you don’t want to open a PayPal account that’s fine just click “continue” next to the line on the bottom right that says, “Don’t have a PayPal account?” If you aren’t satisfied with your purchase I will issue you a refund instantly.

You seem like a super bitch and you are going to die alone with your two ugly cats.

Thank you for the warning and how did you know I have two cats?

I heard there is a picture of you and John Bear kissing in your eBook, is that true? And is he a good kisser?

Yes, he let me publish that picture after I begged him and begged him. And yes, he is an amazing kisser. (See what happens after he gets a kiss from me in this video).

You are not Oprah. Get over yourself.

I know I am not Oprah and, no offense to Oprah, but I am just fine being me and if I woke up tomorrow and was suddenly as famous as Oprah I would buy tickets to Bermuda and disappear forever.

I still think $14.95 is too much money for a PDF, especially when I have to print it myself. You are a sell out.

I’m sorry you feel that way. I think my blog, the over 500 posts and probably thousands of pages you can read here for free every day and now this book are worth even more than $14.95. One day I would like to sell so many eBooks that I can even take down all of the advertising on my site. Believe me, I hate money as much as you do. We should all just be living on a hippie commune and sharing everything for free, loving each other to pieces and smoking giant peace pipes.

How can I help?

If you have read my eBook, go to this page and leave a comment telling me what you thought. If you really can’t swing the $14.95 tell your friends about it on Twitter or Facebook, every little bit helps.

Related posts:

1. Two new single mama bloggers you have to meet.
2. Single Mama Beauty Tip #1: Tan Towels
3. Single Mama Beauty Tip #2

My Secrets are Out…

Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love is here. But first a few words from my delirious haze. I am hoping they make sense…

Before I started writing this blog the whispers in my head, the words of strength from outside of myself were hard to come by. I only knew one or two fellow single moms and living at my mother’s for one year did a number on my social life. I was alone, utterly alone and it was uncomfortable.

I tried to find inspiration in other single mom books and while they were insightful on many levels, all fell short for me. I craved real, honest advice about dating and love. I didn’t know it then but I would soon fill that void myself and also become a voice for single mothers everywhere by shouting from the my little mountaintop: we are beautiful, we are strong and we are sexy as hell. And while this shit ain’t easy we don’t need a man to rescue us, we need to rescue ourselves.

I am not sure where those words came from. They started, I believe, as whispers in my own head or more like echoes. And then you all showed up. Your words and your thoughts inspired me to keep writing, to keep sharing my stories and your words, in turn, became the whispers in my head.

The most common e-mails I receive are from new single moms who have happened upon my site. Sometimes these e-mails come months after they’ve been here, others come after just a few days but they all say one thing, “You have changed how I see myself, you have helped me to become proud to be a single mother.” And then they always add, “And I’ve been searching through all of your archives, devouring each one and trying to find out more!”

I used to have the time to write each one back with a long, personal e-mail linking to old blog posts I knew would help them but now, there are so many, too many to answer and I hate that. I remember how I felt then, wanting someone to just tell me like it was – to lay it down straight. This eBook is for each and every one of you, for being here for so long and to those of you who are just joining us.

And from now on instead of hours of archive searching, all of my readers will now have my eBook, Ms. Single mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex & Love. New readers will use it catch up on everything they’ve missed. And for my long-time readers… this book, you’ll find, ties everything you read here together. There are so many stories I have kept from you – some because I just hadn’t gotten around to writing them and others because I just wasn’t ready.

But now here they are.

Enjoy.

The stories behind the blog.

Need to catch up on what you’ve missed? Or want to know the secrets and stories behind the blog?

Download your copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love for $14.95 and find out:

• How Ms. Single Mama and her ex-husband met and fell in love
• More about the allusive Biker, my first single mom romance
• Read the story about my first single mom crush
• What really happened with Mr. Man
• Why my fling with Cabin Man was so short lived
• Details on how to have a happy and healthy sex life as a single mom along with tips on dating including touchy issues like when to tell him about your single mom status and when to introduce him to the kids.

Click here to preview the first 10 pages or skip ahead and just buy the eBook.

Details: Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love, 120 pages, PDF form. Click the add to cart button to purchase with any major credit card.

Blogger Affiliate Program – make money in your sleep

Become a Ms. Single Mama Uncensored affiliate and you’ll earn 30% back for every copy of the eBook you sell. Simply place banners and code on your website or blog and every time someone clicks that banner and purchases a copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored you’ll receive 30% back that’s about $4.95 a copy. It’s SO easy. Click here to set up your affiliate account.

P.S. The reviews are already coming in - the first is from Amanda at Stack of Spines, “The eBook reads like a girlfriend sitting across from you having cocktails and gushing her hopes, dreams, fears, and heartaches.” Read her entire review here.

and if you’re a blogger, make 30% back for every copy you sell! Read about my super exciting affiliate program here.<— Find badges here too!

Special Thanks:

To John. The irony of this book for single mamas is that I’m not sure it would be here without him… he has been working right alongside me either by watching Benjamin, making me dinner or by designing all of the beautiful banners you see on the site. He’s also been putting up with my sleep deprived, cranky self for over one month now, which is no easy feat – believe me. I adore him for that and am proud to say this book has actually brought us even closer together. Reading it for the first time just yesterday, John told me when he was finished, “I can see now how all of these experiences you had needed to happen before we met.”

And the biggest thanks goes to the true hero of every story I write… my Benjamin.

Congratulations to the Winners:

The Ms. Single Mama Uncensored winners are –

1. Alexis
2. Rebecca M.
3. Ashlea
4. @BobbiJanay
5. @NancyJane17

[You have all been e-mailed with your special code for your free copy. Congratulations and thanks to everyone who entered!]

Related posts:

1. Whispers in the trees (and some sex).
2. Big Tease
3. Why I am a single mother.

As I’m putting the final touches on Ms. Single Mama Uncensored I’m finding that in nearly every thought and in every piece there is even more I want to write. But at some point I have to stop, right? I guess I don’t want to stop though… so expect a Part II or an expanded version after this one (but I’ll be taking a huge break in between because this is obviously not easy, although incredibly exciting and fun).

In the meantime, I have popped my head up for air every once in a while and noticed that Benjamin has grown really fond of the life size E.T. doll we found for $8.50 at the thrift store.

He takes him into bed, outside to play and even sits him on the potty. E.T. was a perfectly normal alien until Murphy came home with this on his head.

He has a bad boo boo where his “you know whats” used to be, on account of being unable to stop licking the area in question.

After we took Murphy to the vet E.T. started coming down with frequent cases of the flu and I’ve actually had to practice the Heimlich on this thing. But if it all of this madness makes Benjamin smile like this, than I know I’m doing something right…

And guess who has figured out how to pose for the camera?

Watch out Ladies.

Okay. Back to work. Some things coming up soon:

• Remember the Lion? Of the Lion and the Tiger… well, even though our date didn’t pan out he is an awesome guy and on that date I told him I had met John just the day before. “But,” I said, “I could feature you on my blog as an eligible bachelor. You’re just so cute!” And very soon now — you’ll all be meeting him.
• A very exciting Ford Fiesta Movement Mission video of John Bear and I’s fashion makeovers.
• Another big Single Edition contest. You’re going to love the package I’ve put together, awesome stuff for single mamas.

Related posts:

1. My new dance partner
2. My Boyfriend
3. So there’s this dog…

An excerpt from Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love, my eBook coming out on July 30th. Leave a comment here and be entered to win a copy.

The Crush

Why losing your heart as a new single mom is not an option

When I first saw him I couldn’t stop staring but I tried. I started rearranging things on my desk, sorting papers and placing all of the errant paper clips back in their little bunny basket. The desk decorations weren’t mine, they were all hand me downs left by the secretary before me. The desk itself was at least thirty years old, giant and heavy with metal edges worn and actually rusting in spots.

Six weeks before I had been an account assistant at a boutique ad agency in the city and now I was here, at the radio station I had interned for in high school. The job had miraculously opened up just days before I’d decided to leave my husband and it paid just enough to cover my bills with a little left over for some groceries. Rather than feeling ashamed for taking such a huge step back, I spent my days laughing with my old co-workers, sharing memories and escaping from the reality that awaited me at my mother’s house. I missed Benjamin terribly during the days, but I needed the eight-hour break my babysitter and mother afforded me.

Every week, one of the station’s shows would feature a guest from the community, an upstanding citizen or someone who wanted to promote an upcoming event like a concert, festival or art fair. When he walked in the door snapped shut behind him and I looked up but he kept walking and took a seat on the bench in the hallway. Clearly he had been here before. His brown pants matched an equally bland shirt and his beard looked scruffy around his soft cheeks and dark eyes. His boots were worn and he tapped his foot a bit before crossing his arms over his thick chest.

“Hi,” I said, “I’m Alaina.”

“Very nice to meet you Alaina,” he said. His voice add a kindness about it, a warm generosity but his eyes were hiding some kind of pain.

“Why are you here?” I asked.

“My band has a few charity shows coming up. You?”

“You’re up,” the show host said. The words broke our conversation and with that the man stood up, nodded politely at me and then ducked into the studio. I relaxed back into my chair and turned the radio up so I could hear his words flowing through the speakers. He was talking about his non-profit organization and his band but all I heard was love, passion, fire – the voice of someone who cared about life and his community. I imagined what it would be like to be on the receiving end of that passion.

To be continued… in Ms. Single Mama Uncensored.

Related posts:

1. Mizrahi’s “blog”, a pregnant man and my crush on Handy Manny.
2. Dear Single Men:
3. That Couple

UPDATE & DISCLAIMER: All words ever written about Mia’s Other Woman on this blog are mine and mine alone, unless otherwise noted. Because we have been best friends our entire lives, I don’t even have Mia proof my posts – she trusts me. Whenever I write about her Other Woman, again because Mia is like a sister to me, I tend to get a bit fired up. Equating her to a woman on Jerry Springer was perhaps out of line. For that I apologize but I meant what I said and have zero tolerance for people who cheat or sleep with married men. Even though it takes two, both parties are equally as guilty as each other.

I have dated enough men who have been cheated on to know that the effects of that kind of broken heart don’t heal so easily. It’s a horrible, horrible thing. But again, my apologies to the Other Woman for going below the belt and most of all to Mia for meddling in her business. I won’t be mentioning the Other Woman on this blog again out of respect for their privacy. And I also want to say that I believe her ex is a good father. He did make a tragic mistake but he loves their daughter immensely. To my readers who may be confused, I am writing this because the Other Woman is reading this blog. We know this because the post that follows upset her and she told her boyfriend (Mia’s ex) who called Mia immediately.

You thought the book was all I had up my sleeve?

Nah. I’m much crazier than that? Why launch just one project when you can have two? These earrings have been in the works for a few months now.  I am also working on a silver set of the new leaf necklace and earrings, which are coming in a few weeks. In the meantime, check out the new earrings in my Ms. Single Mama Shop.

And here is the lovely Mia modeling them for us…

Mia is doing well by the way. Her ex-boyfriend is still with the Other Woman. Yuck. I can’t even imagine being with a man who left his girlfriend and little daughter for me. I mean, really? Have you no self-respect Ms. Other Woman? I imagine her as some chick who could easily take a seat on Jerry Springer and blend right in with the scenery. I digress, sorry, still clearly fired up about all of it but so incredibly happy Mia is not with him anymore.

He doesn’t deserve her.

Not very many men do because Mia is a true spirit, a rare soul and someone who has the strength to grow and heal faster than I ever thought possible. We were talking the other night about the new single mom sympathy stares she’s receiving and the comments like, “Oh, don’t worry honey, you’ll find another one.”

Mia’s response? “Who says I want another one? Are you kidding me? I am loving this, loving being single – what if I never want another one again? Seriously. I think I may want to be single forever.” Her question prompted a big, long response from me – one which I’ll be featuring in Ms. Single Mama Uncensored. So stay tuned for that.

Married or not, if you have kids and you’re in a relationship date night is an absolute must. John Bear is amazing with Benjamin. So amazing in fact that I would be hard pressed to even find an issue to write about here. He is so patient and very aware of the parental learning curve he faces — as we all do when we suddenly have a child in our lives, whether they’re ours or not. But with that said I am three years and nine months ahead of him which means he needs and should have more breaks from the kid stuff than I do. I don’t want to overwhelm the guy. But to take breaks together, that’s another story all together.

Since we started dating he has always insisted on us having at least one date night a week, ideally two nights a week. At first that was tough for me to swallow. Taking an entire night off from everything seemed impossible, let alone two. But now, three months in – I look forward to our designated date nights as much as he does. It is clear to me now why they are so important. Tuesday, our typical date night is big around here, we both get all excited. But this Tuesday – we’re stumped. Where should we go? I was asking on Twitter and than John suggested letting all of you decide. So cast your vote here on where we should go tonight.

If you have a better idea, please leave a comment!

Related posts:

1. Date night.
2. Single Mom Night Out
3. How to Date a Single Mom, Part 6