by mssinglemama on January 11, 2010
John and Benjamin had a bit of a falling out over our Christmas vacation. And if you think a three-year-old and a thirty-year-old can’t be at odds, than I’m about to enlighten you.
In October, I gave John permission to take Benjamin into time outs when he witnessed bad behavior, or when John found himself on the receiving end of the bad behavior. For example, if Benjamin took a swing at John while yelling something like “you butt picker” John had my blessing to take him into his bedroom for a chat and a time out. Then, in November, John took his discipline approach up a notch and started intervening when Benjamin was throwing a fit directed toward me, his one and only precious mama.
Soon our plan back fired and Benjamin started acting out toward John – not only on occasion, but very often. He began saying things to John like “don’t talk to me” and started crying at the idea of John watching him. It wasn’t pretty.
After a particularly bad night over the holidays we all sat down and then I channeled Mrs. Brady and started off our first “family” discussion [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on August 13, 2009
When I meet a single and childless girl I feel an urge to sit her down and have a talk – like a grandmother would.
No, honey, not that one. I don’t care how cute he is or how much money he makes. No, that doesn’t matter. He may be whispering in your ear and promising to change. But he shouldn’t have to change, he should have already changed. Believe me, the last thing you want to worry about when you have kids is changing a man or persuading him to clean up his act or get that job.
The measure of a man, the kind of man you’ll want when you’re married and a mother, isn’t in the car he drives, the clothes he wears or even in the sweet nothings he whispers in your ear. The measure of the man you want is in the way he reacts when you’re both lost on a dark pine shrouded road in the middle of the night. In the way he gives you a back rub. Does he ask how it feels? Is he truly trying to take your pain away or giving up too quickly? At first he may not completely wipe away the knots but if he’s willing to listen and learn, eventually, he will. Actions speak louder than words and how he uses those words, how he listens – that is an action, called communicating.
But he has to be at least six feet tall. At least, she would insist, and blue eyes – those too.
At this point I would bite my tongue, walk away and hope against all hopes that she checks that list against logic and her heart of hearts – the mother in every girl wants a good man, one who would kill for you or, more realistically, love seeing your smile more than anything else on this Earth.
And he might look something like this guy…
Oh, you have no idea how badly I want to tell you about the last seven days of my life.
More on our grand adventure soon… I am not teasing you on purpose, I swear. I am just extremely busy trying to play catch up. Loading these pictures takes forever. Find another round of clues about where our adventure took us in the photo gallery.
P.S. I mailed the first round of silver necklaces out today. Only 20 of those left… they are gorgeous.
by mssinglemama on July 19, 2009
Just when I thought I had mastered all of the awkward single mom phrases, learning to say things like “ex-husband” or “visitation” without flinching, another term comes my way – boyfriend.
Single mom or not, I have never been a fan of the word. Boyfriend just seems so juvenile, to call a boy your friend who is clearly much more than that. But saying it when your child is running around right next to you gives the word an entirely new feeling. [click to continue…]
