by mssinglemama on June 21, 2008
We all have fears.
If you read my blog, you know I’ve got plenty. Namely my fear of commiting to the wrong guy, my fear of my ex-husband watching our son solo for 36 hours a week or his absence from our lives. I like to think I’ve come leaps and bounds in the past year in conquering them, but I still have a ways to go.
Now it’s your turn to step into the confessional.
Tell me about something that shakes you to your core. Maybe you’re afraid of snakes, men, other parents at the playground, your boss, pickles and bologna, your teenager, asking men out … I don’t care what it is. Describe your fear and then tell me how you are going to conquer it. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on June 7, 2008
The Census Bureau reports that half of the 60 million American women who are 45 and older are single.
In his News Day article, Peter Jackson writes that while many of the women are divorced or widowed others are “single by design.” He cites The New Single Woman, a book by E. Kay Trimberger, a professor emeritus of Women’s and Gender Studies at Sonoma State University in California.
Here’s a snippet from the article I found on SingleEdition.com:
She interviewed dozens of single women between the ages of 30 and 60 and found that most of them were leading happy and fulfilled lives. In many cases, they had been building a strong foundation that was not based on someday finding a partner.
“These women were doing all the things that were setting themselves up for a satisfying life,” Trimberger says. She says the older women seemed especially content. Some of the younger women were still wrestling with concerns about whether to have children.
No mention of single moms, but I’m sure the book addresses us …
We’ve already got the kids…so, if we are able to financially support ourselves and our kids – why should we bother getting married again? [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on May 25, 2008
I bought a ticket to Denmark.
I know what you’re thinking. She’s lost her mind! She’s wrapped up in a torrid love affair with the Dane!
My little brother called me when he found out, “Alaina? You’re flying to Denmark? So you’re really serious with this guy, huh?”
There was an obvious hint of concern in his voice, rightly so. I have a reputation for “losing it” over men. I did marry Benjamin’s father just because he needed a Green Card, we were in love – hence the child – but still, it was “crazy.” I did have a tendency to go crazy over men, but now as a single mom, falling in love just isn’t the same. And I’m not falling in love with Thomas…I can’t! He lives an ocean away… but I can visit him. Besides, it’s been years since I’ve had the chance to go to Europe.
So here’s the skinny on the Dane and why he’s worthy of a visit.
Aside from my friend Mia and her daughter Sydney (who calls herself Benjamin’s sister) we have no one in our lives on a regular basis. I have quite a few amazing friends and a very supportive mother, but when it comes to the daily grind – Benjamin and I are completely alone.
Thomas and I had reconnected through Facebook recently and when he told me he was coming through to visit our college town – where we’d met and dated 8 years ago – I offered up my guest bedroom and my services as hostess.
I remembered Thomas as being completely open, honest, fun and of course, incredibly attractive … but how would he handle five days with a single mom and her two year old? I was a bit nervous as his arrival loomed. Personally, I think Benjamin and I are a blast, but not all men see it that way. What if it would be awkward? What if he didn’t like kids? [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on May 15, 2008
My best friend Mia mouthed this to me the other night while Benjamin and Sydney, her four year old daughter, were huddled beneath us eating cookies.
I had been talking about another adult, someone everyone in the room knows and has contact with frequently. Bad mommy. And naive mommy.
I may know a lot about being a dating single mom, but this mommy stuff – all of the rules – not so much. Mia is a few years ahead of me so she gives me pointers whenever she sees an “issue” cropping up. I welcome them and thank her profusely.
On the way to daycare this morning Benjamin started worming his way out of his car seat straps. He likes to do this because it pisses me off, I turn my head and he gets a mouth full of concerned shouts.
“Benjamin! Get your arms back in there! If you don’t – and we crash – you could go splat and die! Now put your arms back in there! Die, get it? Splat – dead.”
“Die! Die! Die! DIIIIIEEEEEEE!” shouts Benjamin. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on May 14, 2008
Once upon a time, I was in love with my son’s father.
At the beginning, he would make me breakfast every morning. He would hold me tight and whisper sweet nothings into my ear. We couldn’t get enough of each other. The sexy french accent didn’t help either. And when he told me it was “Magic” I believed him. I still believe that. It was magic because we were supposed to make Benjamin.
My little prince charming.
Today, for the first time ever, he told me that he loves me.
“I uuvvv ooooh.”
I uv oooh too, Benjamin.
And if I could do it again. If I had to do it all over again, I would. Because you are my everything. And your toes are pretty damn cute too.
When you’ve already got one prince, can you make room for two? Did you ever believe in a Prince Charming? I know I did. I think I still do. Damn you Disney.
