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grief

Things I try not to think about: What if’s? and Whys?

by mssinglemama on January 29, 2008

momanddad.jpgBenjamin and I spent 4 hours in urgent care today. 4 hours! Between chasing Benjamin and keeping him entertained my mind did have a few minutes to wander.

I thought about my father. He was a doctor and all hospitals bring his memory back front and center. I imagined what our lives would be like if he hadn’t died of cancer. First of all – I know we wouldn’t have to be in this horrible urgent care, waiting for hours and hours. I daydreamed about talking to him on the phone – telling him about my day, about Benjamin, about Kris.

Then the thoughts stop. They have to stop – Benjamin has disappeared down the hall – he’s deep into the radiology department. Ironic. Yes. Annoying. More so. [click to continue…]

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