You won’t believe this contest… click to read more and find out what you can win.

I love, love, love giveaways. I think because I just love giving gifts, especially to all of you. In this case – just one of you. Without further ado…

What you can win:

The Tassimo T-20 Brew Bot

This little puppy brews up cappuccinos, espressos, coffees and hot chocolates in less than a minute. Yum. Yum. Nothing beats the local coffee shop, but when you can’t get out of the house – the Brew Bot will be there for you.

Or, when you are rushing off to a fantastic night out on a first date, exhausted and trying to figure out how you can do it all. Dating. Motherhood. Work. You can whip up an espresso and slip into your brand new dress from Shabby Apple.

(re-read that last sentence with Price is Right guy voicing it in your head).

Shabby Apple is offering up a few dresses for the winner to choose from. The cider (pictured above). Or any of these:

Tuxedo III
Barefoot in the Park
Pretty in Pink
Nine to Five
Five to Nine
Duck Beach
Anchors Away
Baja
Circo
L’Amour
Cider
The Traveler
Frida K
Sundance Kid
La Noche Negra
San Gabriel
Cortez
Le Coeur
Green with Envy/Finding Out (maternity)
Better than Sweets (maternity)
24K (plus-size)
Creamsicle (toddlers)
Pink Panther
Not your Mama’s Mumu
45 WPM

And then when you get home you can unwind with a RelaxZen shot. I haven’t tried mine yet, but the all natural ingredients have me intrigued. And on those nights when I am tossing and turning with to-do lists this would be a great help.

To Enter:

Tell me a) which drink you would make first in your Tassimo T-20. Just click here to view the drink options. and b) browse Shabby Apple and tell me which dress you would want. I will pick a winner randomly. Contest ends on Christmas Eve Eve, December 23rd at Midnight.

Related posts:

1. Merry Christmas!
2. Not too shabby: a contest
3. And the winner is…

I’m announcing the winners to three contests today but you’re all winners.

You know why?

Because, long ago, you learned how to go on the potty. If you’ve seen this video you know I don’t like talking about bodily movements or anything close to them in public. But because Benjamin’s bowel movements, or lack thereof, are the reason I am up – right now – at 6:00 a.m., I feel obligated to share.

I am tired but happy, curled up in a little blanket on the big chair in the living room. Benjamin is coloring. I’m happy because he just ate a magnificent breakfast,  breakfast fit for a big kid – three eggs and an entire bowl of oatmeal. He woke up at 5:45 saying, “Mommy, I’m hungry.” Hungry and awake because last night he couldn’t go on the potty and then decided not to go at all. The tummy ache or cramped up poopy feeling made him pass on his dinner. Like the bad mommy that I am, I completely forgot to force a bowl of yogurt on him before bed. Now here we are – awake before the sun is even up.

I’ve tried every bribe in the book, every imaginable thing a kid could want he has been offered on multiple occasions. Last week, when he started clutching his belly and begging for a diaper, jumping up and down saying, “Mommy, it hurts, Mommy, it hurts! I need a diaper”, I told him a big, rotten fat lie. It went something like this, “While you were at your Daddy’s this week Santa came into the house and took each and every one of your diapers. Then he told me he’s watching to see if you poop on the potty. If you do, then he’ll bring you tons of presents at Christmas.”

The kid shot like a dart to the toilet, sat there for a few minutes and then dropped a tiny, little package that was worthy of me freaking out. Then Benjamin joined in the joyous shouting and jumping. At one point he even crushed his arms together like a WWF wrestler and growled, pulsing all of the muscles in his little neck, “I pooooooppped on the potttty. Grrrrrr.”

We called John Bear immediately, “Hello, Santa.” I said. “Benjamin just pooped on the potty and he wants to talk to you.”

“No way! He did?” John Bear was beyond thrilled. It’s something about being a man, he wants Benjamin to learn how to use the potty like one. The diaper thing, although John has been amazing about it, is definitely up there on the slightly uncomfortable although entirely tolerable side effects to dating a single mom.

“Yes, he totally pooped on the potty. So Santa, can you talk to Benjamin?” Benjamin was buying the whole thing hook line and sinker, gazing up at me with his mouth hanging open.

“I’m at work. I can’t do that right now,” he laughed. Well, you’re about to anyway, I thought while looking at my adoring kid.

“Okay, hold on Santa, here he is.”

I handed the phone to Benjamin and then I heard John Bear’s booming Santa voice pipe through the phone. Benjamin could barely speak and after a few seconds of chatting handed the phone back to me. Then we headed out to our favorite used toy store to pick out a prize and when we got home there was a mysterious present waiting on the kitchen table.

“How did this get here? It must have been Santa!” I exclaimed while Benjamin looked on in amazement at the Transformer bobble head doll.

“I was at the grocery store and I saw it so I picked it up,” John told me later. Wow. Perfect timing on all fronts. But, in spite of our flawless pre and post potty package drop extravaganza the next day when he had to go Benjamin gave me one look and then ran up into his room for a diaper. He didn’t even think twice about trying the potty again. We’ve been downplaying it and ignoring it ever since but still encouraging him to go when it’s time.

So, here I am. Wide awake and knowing that I’ll be exhausted in a few hours. Isn’t that the rule of parenthood though, the reason why we all fall off the face of the Earth for years after the newborn arrives – poop and sleep, poop and sleep and then other stuff like teething and growing pains and scary monsters in the closet.

Now you know why you’re all winners.

It’s because at one point in your life your mother was freaking out training you how to use the potty and eventually you both crossed that victory line together. You don’t remember it, I’m sure … but I promise you it was probably quite a feat.

Congratulations.

Now the winners of those fun contests:

My Single Mamas (a sexy contest)

Grand Prize Winner of the Flirty Apron, Ms. Single Mama Uncensored and New Leaf Necklace in brass is: La Primera.

Runners-up, who all receive a copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored:

Miss Kitty
Victoria
Hollie
Angela

My Super Hero Contest

Grand Prize Winner of the I’m Your Bus Back to School Kit, the BabyPop.com cape and a copy of Ms. Single Mama Unccensored is: Single Mom in New England!!!

[I pick these winners randomly by scrolling down with my finger on the screen and when it landed on her I freaked becuase she's been reading my blog since its start.]

Runners-up, who all receive a copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored and I’m Your Bus:

Carol
Kaylin
April

Haunted Bedford Contest

Winner a copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: @alyssainez

Thanks everyone for entering. I think we had over 200 comments in all to the contests. You should know I read every single one of your comments, always. Can’t respond to all of them anymore but I am reading them.

More big contests coming up next week. Going to be really, really good. Not sure why but I get the coolest prizes ever.

Related posts:

1. Boys
2. Boys vs. Men
3. Lebron took off with my head

When I started this blog I had one single mom friend, now I feel I have thousands.

I know many of you feel the same way having found my blog. Often many of you send me photos of yourselves and your little ones and my heart melts each time, especially today when I found this picture in my inbox of Robin and her son Reagan.

I wanted to share these words of her story of calling off her wedding to her abusive fiance:

It was the most stressful time of my life to the point where my hair was falling out like a cancer patient, but oddly enough, it was the most joyous phase of rediscovery and empowerment. I called off the wedding, struck out on my own … but then had to move abruptly to another state, leaving behind a life I carefully built as a young professional because my ex- took stalking to a new level of physical threats of violence. In many ways I lost everything — but in so many other ways I gained an entire world of new possibilities.

Robin is now living her dream career as a new media journalist for Zootoo Pet News, featured on the New York Post among others. Click here to see one of her newscasts and take a look at that beautiful necklace she’s wearing.

Robin’s comment reminds me of something I wrote in Ms. Single Mama Uncensored. Here’s an excerpt from the Rapunzel Complex:

I walked through my mother’s garden and let my hands lightly touch the flowers surrounding me, running my fingertips through their soft petals. I wondered if I could ever be so beautiful and innocent again. Benjamin was in his sling, still stirring, but just seconds away from finally falling asleep. A restless newborn, he had yet to sleep for more than six hours straight. His father had occasionally taken him from me in the night, but Benjamin’s screams would only intensify. Minutes later he would be back in my arms, my exasperated husband insisting I take the baby so he could sleep.

Now my husband was gone. And I was free— well, almost. I still had Benjamin strapped to my chest during all of my waking hours outside of work. The pressure was immense and unrelenting, but the peace that came with that extra few feet in my bed, the quiet drama-free nights and being in control of my destiny – no matter how uncertain it seemed – gave me hope that soon Benjamin and I would be back on our feet and stronger than ever.

In honor of all of my beautiful single mamas finding their way or who have already found their way, here’s another contest! Just leave a comment and you’ll be entered to win.

A sexy apron from FlirtyAprons.com!!!

along with a copy of Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love

And a New Leaf necklace in brass, like the one Robin is wearing in her newscast.

Four runners-up winners will receive a copy of  Ms. Single Mama Uncensored: Dating, Sex and Love.

Just leave a comment and you’ll be entered! Deadline on this one is Friday August 28, 2009. While you’re at it leave a comment in my Back to School Contest, that one runs until September 4, 2009.

[P.S. The silver necklaces are almost gone, I have three left in 18" chains and only 12 in the 16" chain. If you would like a longer chain just leave me a note at your purchase. I have plenty left in both lengths in the brass necklaces. The creator of our necklaces is leaving on a wonderful, extended European vacation so I may not be replenishing the stock until next Spring.]

Related posts:

1. The Ultimate Single Mom Contest
2. Single Mamas for Obama
3. Single Mamas for Obama!

While the rest of the world continues to spin, with all of its good news and bad, there is one little universe that remains unchanged.

The universe of Benjamin, where he must – by now – have realized that he’s kind of cute.

He’s also learning how to play the adults in his life like a fiddle.

With just one pout of those puffy little lips, or one convincing, “newdea” – translation, “new idea” - he can enrapture you with his seemingly true tales of life as a three-year-old.

Somewhere along the road he used this little face to convince his mommy that “daddy said it was okay to pee pee in his diaper” and vice versa. He’s been pinning us both as “diaper push overs” and we’ve both been buying it for weeks.

This next photo, below, this is a photo of his victory smile. It’s the sly little crook of his mouth he whips out after he’s pulled a Don Corleone on your ass.

So if you run into this little man on the street and he starts telling you a tale that has anything to do with ice cream or Transformers and that story involves you or someone you know

whatever you do

do not be distracted by those eyes and that adorable little nose, or his pip squeaking Elmo-esque voice

because this guy has your number (and he knows it).

P.S. Any potty training tips would be appreciated. He’s going #1 just fine but just can’t make the jump to #2. And man, oh man, is this mommy fed up. I’ve tried bribing.  Big bribes. This week John Bear even bought him a Bumble Bee transformer but so far he won’t take the bait.

Check out more pictures from this weekend in my Recently photo album.

—-

It’s been hot out (a contest).

Very hot. The nice, awesome folks at Baying Hound (a locally owned business here in Columbus) gave Benjamin and I some stainless steel drinking bottles so we can drink to our hearts content wherever we may go. I picked Pink Love.

Now it’s your turn.

Pop over to their site and surf through all of their beautiful reusable bottles, then come back here and leave a comment telling me which bottle you would like and if I draw your name – Baying Hound will send you that very bottle.

Good luck! Contest ends on Friday, July 3rd.

Related posts:

1. Hey, Martha…

Things are busy – as always.

I just want you to know that I’m reading each and every one of your comments.

There are just so many that if I can’t respond to them all, I’d rather not respond to any. Is that crazy? But know this – I am reading each and every one and loving them all. More than loving, your comments are better than vitamins.

Especially in the Ultimate Single Mom Contest – the comments are absolutely amazing. If you haven’t left a comment yet, do it today because I’m drawing a name Thursday night for a free iHeartSingleParents t-shirt. I’ll announce the winner on Monday with a video. Benjamin will be pulling a name out of a hat.

I am also trying to find the time to make my next advice video (have to come up with a name for them, if you have any ideas, let me know). Over 400 of you have watched the first video on How to Get Over Your Ex so either, you’re all laughing at me or you like it – regardless, I’ll be making more… soon.

Back to the busy thing. Over the course of the past few months I have discovered more single mom blogs than I can count. There’s no way to tell for certain, but I think the single parent blogosphere is exploding.

Here are three new single mom bloggers you have to check out.

Each of these posts had me at hello. Seriously, get clicking.

• Irascible Crayons says forgiveness is the best revenge. I couldn’t agree more. This post had me beaming and pumping my fist in the air. Fantastic.

• Bad Mummy, No Cookie wrote a brutally honest piece recently on her habit of sleeping with men too soon. We’ve all been there and this piece captures those raw emotions.

• And if anyone has ever said, “I’m sorry to hear that,” after you inform them that you are a single mother, read this post by Little Country Girl.

Related posts:

1. Your Turn…
2. The Ultimate Single Mom Contest

You all rock. Single moms rock. Blogging rocks.

So let’s have a little contest, shall we?

UPDATE: This contest is now closed… thanks everyone for your comments!!! I’ll be announcing the winner on Monday, November 3 with a video of Benjamin picking the winner’s name. FUN! Thanks again… if you would still like to leave a comment about being a single mom, by all means – comment away.

Maybe we’ll piss off even more haters… or maybe I will. Not quite sure but I could care less. My main mission with this blog is to give each and every one of you – my single mom readers – an extra ounce of confidence, maybe an extra ounce of pride and hopefully the ability to rise up to the occasion and feel empowered by your single motherhood.

I know it sucks.

I know it’s not easy.

But we can make the best of it, right?

If we can’t – than our children suffer. So, in my eyes, making the best of it is necessary to surviving this madness. Easier said than done, I know. It took me over one year to snap out of my new single mom funk and wake up to the realization that I could do this – not only do it, but do it well. That year felt like an eternity.

The contest:

Tell me one bright side to being a single mother.

Just one. Even if you hate being a single mom – tell me one thing that makes you happy. That’s it. Just one – could be anything, from dating, the house, the kids or work.

The prize:

I couldn’t help but notice (thanks to my site stats) that quite a few of you are interested in the iHeartSingleParents tank tops and t-shirts. So the winner gets to pick out their favorite and I’ll have it shipped to you. The one you see here is Benjamin’s favorite. If you haven’t joined iHeartSingleParents – the first and greatest single parents social network – get over there.

The tank tops run small but there are larger sized t-shirts as well. Surf them all here.

I’m picking the winner randomly - so again, even one little squeak of a comment will qualify you – but feel free to leave a long-winded one as well or even enter a blog post on the topic.

Deadline: Thursday, October 30 at 9:00 p.m. (ET)

Related posts:

1. The ultimate prize: a single mom.
2. The ultimate single dad.
3. Flatten Your Fear Contest Winners!

This was so hard! My fear this week has been trying to choose a winner of my Flatten Your Fear & Win a Flat Iron Contest.

1st Place Fear

“Will my daughter love my ex and his new family more than me?” by Pisces Hanna

Hanna won because her fear is one most of us can relate to but it’s also a fear many of us would never have the guts to write down. Here’s an excerpt for her post.

As soul-crushing and vomit-inducing as it was to hear “I just never really loved you”, it was an even bigger test to see the one whose ring you wore on your finger slide so easily into a new relationship. A relationship that involved another (younger, blonder) single mom and her two kids.

The first time all three of us met, it wasn’t pretty. He and She huddled together on the couch, blowing smoke in my direction while they looked over my parenting plan, scowling. She told him that my plan was “bullshit” and that he shouldn’t agree to it. He nodded in agreement. It was official. I hated her.

That was 6 months ago. Since then, the three of us (and sometimes herex) have met with reasonable amounts of civility, and I’m quite proud of the fairly low amount of White Trashiness that has been involved in the exchange. Its still weird seeing her wear his T-Shirts; the ones I used to sleep in, and think about how smooth the transition from me to her was. Its almost like the life HE had with me and LB never even happened, and now there’s some blonde girl wearing his t-shirts.

Last weekend LB cried when I came to pick her up. For the first time, she didn’t want to leave “Daddy and Amber” That was the day my worst fear surfaced. It hit me like a dodge ball to the face. Questions started bombarding me.

What if this girl is more than just the next one to wear his T-shirt? What if their relationship lasts longer than ours did? What if the engagement that never followed through in my life, magically transports to HIS and HER reality? What if LB gets a half-sibling before I ever even start dating again? What if the family that her daddy has so neatly fit himself into becomes the family that LB wants to be apart of? What if that family becomes more important than me?

Read the rest of the post and her plans to conquer this fear here.

2nd Place Fear

“Am I failing as a parent?” by Insanity of Organized Chaos

I don’t even know her name but Goin’ Crazy wrote a heart wrenching post on her greatest fear – failing as a parent. She’s the single mom of two kids and it’s not easy. Here’s the portion of her post that really got me.

Being a parent is hard, being a single parent is twice as hard. No one hands you “Single Parenting for Dummies” as a parting gift for a failed relationship. No one gives you a cheat sheet on how to answer the kids’ hard questions. No one tells you how hard it will be just to find 5 minutes to cry so the kids will not see. No one tells you how often you will need that 5 minutes just to make it through another day. No one tells you how agonizing it is to hear your kids say that daddy doesn’t love them or care about them. No one tells you how hard it is to say “yes, he loves you very much and cares about you very much” and keep the anger and sadness out of your voice.

Part 1-Check. My soul has taken a small beating but I made it.

Part 2-How am I going to conquer this fear?

Surprisingly, this is the easy part….

They are my kids. That’s it. Nothing else.

Right on crazy woman! We just keep going – that’s it. We have to. Read the rest of the post here.

3rd Place Fear

“What if life crushes my daughter? by O Solo Mama

I absolutely love this comment by O Solo Mama. It’s something we all fear and she captured those feelings. What if life throws some major punches at our kids when they get older … how will we, as parents, find the strength to stand by and let life happen to our kids despite this fear. Here are my favorite pieces of her comment.

I have no fear of my daughter becoming a teen or giving me the “look” (at 11, it’s already happened) or wandering this world without me. But I do worry about something stupid killing her curiosity and drive. A bad or obsessive relationship that suddenly makes her forget about herself? Doesn’t look the obsessive type, but if it should happen, please, God, make it quick. . .with no long-term consequences. What about some nitwit telling her she doesn’t have the __________ make it in ____________? What if she tries and fails? What if she can’t get up again? What if I can’t do anything about it? What if, what if. . .

….Right now as I write this, my daughter is playing hide-and-seek with three friends. She is kneeling beside my computer table and just reached out to pat my leg, as if to say, “No one but you knows I’m here.” So there’s my fear in a nutshell! No one else knows this child like I do. Find the complete comment here.

Honorable Mention Fear

“Can I really make it work with my ex-husband?” by Single Working Mommy

This is an open and honest post in which Single Working Mommy pours her heart out about her fears of trying again with her ex-husband. Here’s an excerpt.

Son LOVES his dad. His dad desperately wants to be a part of his life. Should I be the person who stands in the way of that just because I can’t make a few compromises? But, then again, what if I agree to jump into this thing, and I CAN’T make the compromises? And I end up angry and bitter? What if I don’t *really* love SD? What if we just get back together now, to break up a few years later when Son actually knows the difference?

Each and every one of you. Seriously. I probably went through and re-read these comments and posts 10x. I really did not like having to choose a winner…but someone had to do it. Right? Read the rest of the post here.

More mentions and some entries that just floored me:

• Oakland Mama who wrote that several months after her split she still finds herself “thinking it would be better to be in that angry, passionless marriage than be alone.”
• Debbie who is trying to put the pieces of her life back together and finds herself having to start all over again at the age of 41.
• Lara who is worried she and her husband’s choice not to have children is the wrong one.
• Emily who says her worst fear is “That my sweet, sensitive, inquisitive two-year old, who thanks people for everything and gives a thousand hugs, will transform, I won’t be able to stop it, and one day I’ll come home to find that the hole in the wall to patch is from him, or that he’s drunk, or that he broke his hand from punching something other than the wall.”
• Mommy Pie who confessed that she can’t sleep in a room with empty shoes lying around (love that woman).
• Erin M. who is busting her butt going to school while working and raising her little one all one her own.
• Jessica who feels like she has been forced to give up her dream of becoming a lawyer because her husband is in the Airforce.

And to think – I haven’t even touched on the ways you all plan to conquer these fears! I loved each and every one of them and I thank you all so much for pouring your heart out. Many of you wrote that it helped – just to get it out there – I hope that’s true and that you come back to these a few months from now only to find that you’ve kicked your fears.

Thanks again to Misikko.com for donating the first prize, a fabulous Hana Salon ceramic flat iron.

And thanks to Rachel Sarah for donating a copy of her awesome book Single Mom Seeking and Mary Pols for giving us a copy of her new book Accidentally on Purpose for the second and third place winners.

[Photo Credit: Sethbarnes.com]

Related posts:

1. Flatten Your Fear & Win a Flat Iron!
2. We’ve got a live one…
3. Do I Need Therapy? Nope. Just a fantastic comment thread.

Just a little over 24 hours left to bring out your fears to win a $200 flat iron!

I don’t know how I’m going to pick a winner. If you haven’t read the entries, get busy. Some will make you cry, others will make you laugh. All in all, I’d say it’s been a good week for bringing out the fears.

And because we’re all clearly afraid of death I had to post this video, Monty Python and the Holy Grail – quite possibly one of the greatest movies of all time.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=grbSQ6O6kbs

Contest deadline is Friday at midnight (PST). Enter here.

Related posts:

1. A Christmas miracle…I got to go to the grocery…alone.
2. Flatten Your Fear & Win a Flat Iron!
3. Best Single Mama Movies

Benjamin has been at my mom’s for three days now. I’ve been so busy…having fun! Lots of it.

Shopping

Tonight I worked late to catch up on some big projects, then popped into Ann Taylor Loft and found quite a few treasures on the sales rack. Two super cute summer tops, a necklace and a belt!

Men

Then I headed to the coffee shop. For the past few weeks Benjamin and I keep bumping into this guy. We’re usually in a hurry but there’s always quick small talk. Tonight, I’m a childless mama … so we could actually talk. I pay for my coffee and then see him … I fill my coffee with creamer and sugar and then just do it – I just walked right up and said, “Hi!”

Immediately we were chatting it up and then he asked me to sit down. We talked for about 45 minutes. It was like a spontaneous mini-date. Will it ever be a real date? Who knows. I’m indifferent. And honestly, after our mini-date, not sure if I want a real one. (Purple Octopuses).

That’s the funny thing about asking men out or just walking up and talking to them. You might find that your “crush” really isn’t that crush worthy. Then you don’t waste time wondering about him. Would you rather have the wax ripped off in one quick flick or would you rather it slowly pulled, piece by piece?

Approach men and you find out if there’s potential…quickly. And either way – whether it’s you or him doing the quick rip – at least you know. I prefer the quick rip: less painful in the long run.

Life is too short. Seriously.

FREE Stuff

Speaking of life being too short. I have so much to do! And without Benjamin here I can stay up later and sleep in a little later. Tonight I got on a cleaning kick, a much overdue cleaning kick. Look what I scrounged out from under our living room chair.

Wonder how all of this got here? Hmmm… could it have been a little two-year-old with a funny sense of humor, or a mom shoving it under the chair in hurried preparation for dates or sitters? I honestly couldn’t tell you – but there it is. A bunch of forgotten toys and gizmos, oh, and a shoe!

This little pile has inspired a contest, my first contest! So you better play. And it’s easy. Here goes…

MSM Contest: What’s Under Your Couch??

Look under your couch right now. Tell me about something you’ve found. I’ll pick a winner for each of the following categories:

1. Cutest

2. Funniest

3. Grossest

And

4. Best in Show

The Prize

Something in this pile. The four winners each get to pick a prize from the pile! As you can see there’s lots of good stuff in this pile. A baby music toy, a Leap Frog pad, an empty Thomas DVD case, a little fire truck, an outlet extension thing…and some markers.

Or, you can waive on something from the pile and I’ll send you a mystery item (probably from some other pile I find under something else, or maybe it will be a really cool book…you’ll have to find out).

Now go look under your couch…and may the best man or woman win.

Related posts:

1. Online shopping – my only option.
2. The birthday scramble and single mama shopping.
3. Toddler-free (for one week?)