by mssinglemama on February 21, 2010
When I met John Bear I didn’t have non-stop butterflies jumping around in my stomach.
I didn’t ache or pine for him.
I didn’t daydream about him, waiting for him to call.
Instead, I felt like a level-headed woman, slowly falling for someone who swept me away with his generosity, kind spirit, sweet surprises and constant mantra, “I’m not going anywhere.”
And he didn’t go anywhere. Not then.
Not even then.
And not now.
And I don’t think that’s going to change anytime soon. We are completely and utterly into each other, but in a new kind of way (for both of us).
Earlier this weekend a single mom girlfriend of mine was telling me about a recent nice guy she’s dating who pampers her with dinners, gifts, nice words and kind actions but there’s something missing.
“I just don’t feel the butterflies,” she said.
And while this guy may not be a keeper, I still had to slap down some advice in hopes of breaking her in for a future of dating only nice guys, or as I like to call them – real men. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on August 15, 2008
Ummm, yeah – what’s up with that?
I mentioned this in my post, Chaos and Calm, in reference to Kate Hudson and Chris Robinson and how I can
relate…
To that bad boy complex thing.
I just don’t get it. My ex-husband was definitely a bad boy. Tattoos from head to toe, actually to his butt. He passed out at a party and someone tattooed a Care Bear heart on his ass. But I didn’t see that until it was too late. (Not the tattoo, the fact that he was a bad boy). You see… the bad boys can disguise themselves.
They start out warm and fuzzy, lots of compliments honed over time after their experiences with many women. Or they’re just completely rough from the start – sparing in their compliments and leaving you craving more.
Over on my old blog Vanessa from YouCanGettheGuy.com left this fantastic comment:
“OMG – the bad boy complex! Do you know HOW many women are absolutely wrecked by this same thing? I know I suffered from it for many years (and now consider myself in remission!).
You know what I think it is? Its all about attraction. We say we WANT the nice guy, but we are ATTRACTED to the bad boy. It like its evolution-based. Survival of the fittest, you know? the bad boy actually represents what we want our genetics to BE. He is the “alpha male”, the strong one, the survivor and the winner. The “nice guy” – who we want mentally, is not necessarily the strongest.”
I am also in Bad Boy remission.
Kris was definitely a nerd, but even nerds act like bad boys sometimes and that makes them hotter. WHY? Thomas is definitely not a bad boy but he’s just as hot as the hottest bad boy. And even the Biker was a big mush ball at heart despite his rough exterior. So I have yet to have a bad boy since becoming a single mom.
Sweet.
But the coast isn’t clear until the fat lady sings or until the single mom stops dating forever.
Tell me about your Bad Boys and your theory on the Bad Boy Complex. What do you think about Vanessa’s comment?
If you liked this post read Why Nerds Make Better Lovers.
