Free time.

by mssinglemama on February 23, 2011

My mother kidnapped Benjamin on Monday. There’s no telling when she will bring him back.

When it started snowing at her house, which is on the most beautiful piece of land in Athens County, Benjamin said, “That’s it. I think I have to stay here forever.”

It is always sporadic and unplanned, his mini-vacations to Grandma’s.

Depends on her schedule, which varies from week to week. She’s a free spirit and always reminding me that the unplanned can be quite nice. Had I planned for a week sans Benjamin there would have been much anticipation and expectations. This way, it’s just–a nice, unexpected break from the daily grind.

So, what’s a single mom to do with her free time?

Go out and find men? Get manicures? Massages?

Nope, not going to happen and afraid to say, no.

I am discovering that my old methods of coping and my old ideas of having fun are now null and void. Being a business owner has changed everything. So, no going to bars to find men. I instead am still on my man moratorium and will only date one again if he is introduced via a friend or a professional contact. No bars, no dating sites – no looking. And as for the manicures and massages, back to being a business owner, I can’t spring for them. And also saving for the down payment on our house, which I am now buying from John.

Fun. (With just a hint of sarcasm there).

The most fun, truly? Just being with myself. It’s what I need right now. Peace and quiet, with a few select friends in the mix. Those who are still standing.

Speaking of my business. Here is our new logo:

Exciting, right? I think so and also completely terrifying. If you are an adrenaline junkie, open your own business during a recession.


Did I tell you all that I am certifiably insane? If not, you’ve been warned.

Completely unrelated but it’s been on my mind. Who has seen the manifesto? And do any of you have one now?

{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

Stac February 23, 2011 at 2:39 pm

Home manicures! Nothing cheaper than free 🙂


missmeinMN February 23, 2011 at 2:42 pm

hmmm..haven’t seen the manifesto yet??? can’t wait to get it!!


Anna February 23, 2011 at 5:35 pm

So jealous of your me-time. Use it how you want — you only live once!

Love the logo, too.


findingmyvoice February 23, 2011 at 9:24 pm

I’ve been following the blog since I began my own journey into single mother hood. It inspired me to blog about my own journey. It is very therapeutic! Thanks!


Eli February 24, 2011 at 12:15 am

So lucky…enjoy your free time. It’s just nice knowing that your child is safe and happy at grandma’s. But if you can…maybe go out one night. It’s fun getting all dolled up…inviting a friend or two…and hitting a happy hour somewhere. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, get back on the saddle. Even if it’s just for a few hours. 😉


Sasmita February 24, 2011 at 5:59 am

Great! you have so much time to spend alone which I am waiting since long….
No free time even in weekends….sad!

I don’t have a kid…’s my husband who takes all my time. Hahahaha


Sara February 24, 2011 at 8:42 am

I was wondering about the Manifesto?…..

I am happy you are able to have time to yourself, it’s great to re-charge.


Sharri February 24, 2011 at 10:25 am

I was wondering about the manifesto too!


Katie February 24, 2011 at 5:12 pm

I totally understand holing up and staying put. There are definately times where I feel I need to push myself to go out and get my swerve on and face the world.


amy February 24, 2011 at 11:42 pm

How wonderful to have some “ME” time 🙂


Layla February 25, 2011 at 2:13 pm

I love “me” time! Which is clearly time just by myself, alone and ususally involving work or working-out. I also started my business just when the recession started to take hold in 2007. I then became separated from my husband in 2008 and offically divorced in 2009. Thus I am a single parent, business owner and single woman. But I hear you loud & clear. I just got out of a relationship as well and I am not dating for 1 year. Nada.. no date, no men, nothing but focusing on me. So, I will back you up on it being important for you to focus on you, your business & your son first. Love can take a lot of your time & disctract you from your personal goals. I’m not saying I don’t believe in love, it’s just that sometimes you need to worry about yourself & your son first. Love with follow…. when the time is ready and you are ready. Love will hit you just when you have things back in balance.
~ L.


barb February 27, 2011 at 11:31 pm

You’re a joke


Thrifty Vintage Chic March 14, 2011 at 6:41 pm

Great logo!! Love it! But sadly, no manifesto in sight.


cheap dating March 31, 2011 at 2:08 am

you are so lucky that you have free time you spend your free time for some special purpose you make good friends and share your knowledge.


Lucy McBees October 15, 2011 at 5:37 pm

Hi singlemama
I was wondering about the manifesto too! Thank you.
Cheers Lucy.


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