Flying

by mssinglemama on November 5, 2009

Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.

Little did I know he was right under my nose.

IMG_2395When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.  The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like thisIMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.Little did I know he was right under my nose.I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like thisIMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.  The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.  The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like thisIMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.Little did I know he was right under my nose.I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like thisIMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.Little did I know he was right under my nose.IMG_2395When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.  The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.IMG_2395I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like thisIMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.Little did I know he was right under my nose.I highly recommend you find a copy.That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like thisIMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.Little did I know he was right under my nose.

Your classic chain reaction of rejection and hurt. She hurt me so I am going to stick my gum right here so I can ruin someone else’s day. If you can think of a more probable explanation for the gum on the seat than I am all ears. Just my hypothesis.

The gum leads me to thinking about anger and why we harbor it, why we carry hatred around with us like a heavy bag. Not just single moms, but people in general. Why is it so damn hard to drop that baggage?

Is it because we don’t know how to live without defining ourselves by our past? And how do we shed the viscous and often completely misguided labels others give us?

When we finally do we’ll drop pounds of anger. But many of us carry it around taking it out on undeserving strangers, a first date or the lady behind the counter – and plane seats.

Such a waste.

Just drop it. There’s too much life to live. And get some sleep, that will help too.
My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.  The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.

IMG_2395
When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.
My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.  The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.

IMG_2395
When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any single girl at heart consider throwing in the towel.
My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.

The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.

IMG_2395
I highly recommend you find a copy.

That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.

When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this – it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.
My little sister wrote this unbelievable story.

The main character, a young woman who has been mauled by a crazed dog feels as if the ugliness inside of her is now on the outside for everyone (namely the men she dates) to see. The short story is actually published, for real, in a for real publication – the Indiana State Review.

I highly recommend you find a copy.

That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.

When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this

IMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.
Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.

Little did I know he was right under my nose.

I highly recommend you find a copy.

That story is a mish-mash of she and I’s dating lives during our early 20’s. Choosing the wrong men, dumping the right ones – all for the wrong reasons. But then facing those scars, bringing them out into the open and wanting to hide so desperately that it hurts. But you can’t hide when someone loves you like this because he’s not going anywhere, no matter how hard you try to scare him away.

When you’ve shown a man that side of yourself and he’s still around, and still smiling at you like this

IMG_2395 it’s enough to make any girl consider throwing in that single towel.
Check it out, our sixth and final Ford Fiesta Mission. I had to find someone to play the part of a celebrity.

Little did I know he was right under my nose.

Your classic chain reaction of rejection and hurt. She hurt me so I am going to stick my gum right here so I can ruin someone else’s day. If you can think of a more probable explanation for the gum on the seat than I am all ears. Just my hypothesis.

The gum leads me to thinking about anger and why we harbor it, why we carry hatred around with us like a heavy bag. Not just single moms, but people in general. Why is it so damn hard to drop that baggage?

Is it because we don’t know how to live without defining ourselves by our past? And how do we shed the viscous and often completely misguided labels others give us?

When we finally do we’ll drop pounds of anger. But many of us carry it around taking it out on undeserving strangers, a first date or the lady behind the counter – and plane seats.

Such a waste.

Just drop it. There’s too much life to live. And get some sleep, that will help too.
The plane lands with a jerk as I reach under the seat to rescue my purse from its lonely spot on the floor.

I stretch my fingers into the darkness hoping my purse is the only thing I find. This is the last leg on a whirlwind of business trips. The first one to Baltimore and the second to Boulder. My team and I were in and out of each city in less than 36 hours. In Boulder, the whirlwind included scenery that takes your breath, steals it and then gives it back again.

How about a mountain with your coffee?

IMG_2792

But now all I want is my purse, my keys, my car, John Bear and my bed. In that order. Benjamin will have to wait until the morning because he is already asleep.

I turn my face toward a piece of chewing gum the passenger before me had wedged into the pleather fold of the seat pocket. If I am facing it, there’s no way the gum can capture my hair. After accepting the gum’s existence at the start of our two hour flight I then tried to envision the type of person who would actually do such a thing.

My first imaginary gum chewing culprit is a 10-year-old boy with an attitude. But women and children are few and far between on these business flights. I throw the kid away and settle on a vision of a slightly overweight middle-aged man with dark shadows under his eyes, greasy hair and a bruised ego courtesy of the cute blond chick who had refused to give him her phone number at a bar the night before.

Your classic chain reaction of rejection and hurt. She hurt me so I am going to stick my gum right here so I can ruin someone else’s day. If you can think of a more probable explanation for the gum on the seat than I am all ears. The gum leads me to thinking about anger and why we harbor it, why we carry hatred around with us like a heavy bag, like a tasteless and old nasty piece of gum. Not just single moms, but people in general. Why is it so damn hard to drop that baggage?

Is it because we don’t know how to live without defining ourselves by our past? And how do we shed the vicious and often completely misguided labels others give us?

When we finally do we’ll drop pounds of anger. But many of us carry it around taking it out on undeserving strangers, our own family, a first date or the lady behind the counter – and, of course, plane seats.

Just drop it, already. There’s too much life to live. And get some sleep, that will help too.

P.S.

Speaking of  baggage. Mr. Man texted me during my rushed business trip to Boulder, Colorado asking about this recipe. I’m telling you, they are the best pancakes on Earth.

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

T November 5, 2009 at 8:57 pm

Amen to that sister.

*off to get some sleep*

Reply

Courtney November 5, 2009 at 10:19 pm

I agree completely!! Life is too short to sweat the small stuff and harbor anger. We should all live life to the fullest everyday.

Reply

Jenna Jean November 6, 2009 at 8:47 am

I lived in Boulder for 18 years, it was the most beautiful place in the entire world. Trust fund hippies make the world a better place.

http://www.ifeelyaophelia.com
Jenna Jean

Reply

Mel November 6, 2009 at 9:59 am

Hi, I am new to you. Yesterday, I was looking for a quote regarding President obama’s single mother and your page popped up in the google search. Thank you so much for posting it . I had to tell off this “brotha” because he said the single mother movement failed miserably .I reminded him that we are doing quite fine especially if the first multi-ethnic president came out of single parent household…Before getting off my soap box, I left him with the you-tube clip you provided. I wondered why some men would condemn women for excelling at a job some men obviously didn’t want. hmph!

Now for the comment for today’s post. I currently work as a flight attendant for a legacy carrier – and my motto is this : “if we want to take off and soar we have to leave the baggage behind” :-)…Wonderful thought-provoking blog!

Reply

Yvonne November 6, 2009 at 10:56 am

I have so much baggage….not just from my failed marriage but from my childhood as well. I grew up with an alcoholic father and a depressed mother. The youngest of four, I pretty much was left to fend for myself. We were very poor but I am grateful for my parents hard work. We were never without the basic necessities-food/shelter. We grew up however, without any warmth-hugs/kisses/words of encouragement. Every weekend was the same for as long as I could remember. Coming home from school on friday afternoon..my dad would be drinking. So friday and saturday would be an all out war on the homefront. Yelling, Fighting, Crying, Doors Slammed and then Sunday morning my mom would spend the day in bed depressed. By Monday it was back to normal…as if the weekend never happened. Except by Friday…it would start all over again.

My father is sober now and has been for the past 15 years. My parents are still married. But that way of living affected my siblings and I. We were never exposed to what a normal loving relationship was supposed to be. Suffice to say, my three siblings and I have all been divorced. We all married men who were either alcoholic-mentally/physically/emotionally abusive-controlling. With the exception of my brother who is the aggressor in his relationships.

My point..I don’t even know if I have one. I guess I’m just overwhelmed by the amount of baggage that I carry. I have yet to be in a healthy relationship…My therapist says that because of my upbringing I don’t get close enough to my partners..which was a good thing because I finally did leave my abusive marriage before it could have damaged my young kids. So walls, I have nothing but walls and baggage. And i’m still that scared little girl that hid in the closet every weekend. 🙁

Reply

Amyinbc November 6, 2009 at 8:58 pm

With your family history you may want to talk to your doctor about anti-depressants. It seems to me your parents both had depressive tendencies which unfortunately can be passed down. I would know. My parents were also depressive when I was growing up and my brother killed himself at 20.

With counseling, medication and a healthy outlook (and the constant need to keep happy) I like to think I have overcome the family curse.

I too liked to blame my parents for the person I was until I was older and realized they did the best they could and therefore so should I…

Hoping there are brighter days ahead of you 🙂

Reply

arscuore November 8, 2009 at 12:47 pm

I think some of us carry our anger because we think it makes us more interesting… Just a theory.

My difficulty is letting go of the anger I have for my ex over the way he ignores our son (broken promises, the whole deal). It is now, a year later, starting to have a devastating affect on my little boy. I keep reading about forgiveness. Hard to do when the mama bear reflex rears her head.

Reply

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