Dread Pirate Benjamin

by mssinglemama on November 2, 2009

In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, visit so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, help like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that leave me filled with regret or fail me in some way.]
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, for sale rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, for sale rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, ailment rightfully so, sale is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, for sale rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, ailment rightfully so, sale is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, check rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, for sale rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, ailment rightfully so, sale is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, check rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, capsule rightfully so, viagra 100mg is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, viagra buy Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, for sale rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, ailment rightfully so, sale is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, check rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, capsule rightfully so, viagra 100mg is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, viagra buy Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, viagra 100mg rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
In a flurry to find comfortable shoes before I started my new job I found these:

Teva Boots

And I have been wearing them ever since.

They’re by Teva, cheapest sickness so they’re beyond comfortable and oh so cute. I found them in a store in Charlottesville but you can also find them on Zappos.com for the lovely price of $119.95.

[Full disclosure: I bought these myself and I just love them. I share products that are out of this world awesome with my readers because I, like every other mom, hate wasting money and time buying products that disappoint.]
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, approved or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there too. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.
Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

Both of my cats disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, web or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, visit this flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.” At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


Benjamin spotted one of our cats today.

They both disappeared when Murphy started hanging out here. Today we say Lily. She’s gray I think the neighbor must be feeding her, erectile or all of the neighbors. My cats used to live out at my mother’s with us so they’re feasting out here with all of these harmless humans. Much better than the wild dogs and giant raccoons.

Mom is selling the raccoon house. Found out a few weeks ago. She’s moving into one that is very similar but even further into the woods. This one won’t be on the top of a steep hill but next to a calm, mind flat pond. My brother sent me this picture.

So now I am going to tell people my mother lives “even deeper” in the forest instead of just “out in the forest.”

At least she’ll have a swing.

—-

I have to travel again for work next week.

I told my boss if it becomes a regular thing that I’d go “Mama Bear on his ass.” I actually said that in his office. But I had just stepped off of a plane that zipped me in and out of Baltimore faster than you can say Baltimore so I am blaming it on the stale sky air that also gave me two zits. I call them Baltimore zits. You can call them Alaina’s ugly zits.

And now you all know about my zits. It doesn’t matter. You’ll all see them in my sixth and final Fiesta Mission video that I’m completing tomorrow night at the High Ball. I have to find someone dressed like a celebrity and then have them play the part. The zits will be there. Maybe I should find a costume with a mask.


The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, information pills rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, more about rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, pill rightfully so, check is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, for sale rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” said family member, who shall remain unnamed seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, ailment rightfully so, sale is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there at the party. I think he may have stayed for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, check rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror and then he said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, capsule rightfully so, viagra 100mg is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, viagra buy Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they find this blog. [You all should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
The real reason I’ve been frozen.

It recently came to my attention that some of my family members – family members who I don’t even see or speak to on a regular basis – are keeping up with my life through this blog.

Their conclusion, viagra 100mg rightfully so, is that I am a self-absorbed mother who puts herself over her own son.

“Benjamin’s birthday party, Alaina?” the family member, who shall remain unnamed, seethed into the phone.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Have you ever been to a kids birthday party, Alaina?”

“Yes and they’re pretty boring.”

“Not for the kids. That was your party Alaina, not Benjamin’s.”

He had been there – at the party – for about 40 minutes, I couldn’t be sure because, yes, I was having an awesome time and he had been staring on disapprovingly. Benjamin’s real birthday party – you may remember the video – happened on his actual birthday three days prior to the stranger-people are invited birthday party.

At the time Benjamin had three little friends on his invitation list. Perhaps I should have had a more traditional kids birthday party but my apartment is so small I wasn’t even sure where anyone would go. Hell, even having a birthday party as a working single mom was an accomplishment in my eyes. And every time I saw Benjamin he was running around having a blast or outside playing bubbles.

My family member went on between my protests and gasps of horror over the phone and then said –  “It’s just all about you – Ms. Single Mama.”

Hearing the name of this blog and I guess my online persona coming out of his mouth like that was indescribable. My own flesh and blood was jumping to a conclusion many men before him have had when they see my blog. [You should read some of the comments I delete].

It’s a logical conclusion if you take this blog at face value.  But as my real friends know this is just a 2-D view of my life. I write about life from my perspective because it is my blog, not because I am obsessed with myself.  I don’t walk around talking about myself all of the time and referring to myself as Ms. Single Mama.

After our phones, fortunately and eerily, both died simultaneously I didn’t call him back. That divide will not be healed today or tomorrow and when you’re up against a pre-conceived image of yourself than how do you fight that? I thought about deleting the blog, not writing anymore. All of this fueled by the idea that one day said family member and others may tell a grown up Benjamin that his mother was a self-absorbed jerk who always put herself ahead of him.

Fear. All of it fear. Fear of today’s actions affecting my life with Benjamin tomorrow. I am not a fan of fear though. And any decision made out of fear is never a good one.

My decision

I am going to keep blogging and I want all of you to know – this is my corner of the world where I do get to talk about my feelings, uninterrupted. This is not a true reflection of my day to day life. Believe me. And if a family member is going to judge me by one birthday party where – gasp – the adults actually had fun than how can I fight that? If I lived my life in fear of what stranger family members think of me than I wouldn’t be living much at all.

Thanks for sticking around while I figure all of this out.

I am closing the comments because I don’t want any of you to bash said family member. Even though he broke my heart into a million pieces when he said the things he said, there is no reason to cut him down. That’s how he feels. That is his view of my life, of this blog and of Benjamin’s life and there is nothing I can do to convince him otherwise.

And said family member has never been mentioned on this blog before – only because we just don’t know each other that well. Didn’t want you to think these words came from anyone I have already virtually introduced you to.

On a lighter note… read about Benjamin’s real third birthday party.
Post removed by BlogHer for advertising conflicts. To view the video I made in honor of the car I can not mention, ed click here.

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