Comments on: A Little Surprise & Date Night http://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/ Single Mom Dating? Real advice from a real single mom. Thu, 24 May 2012 13:52:15 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Ashleyhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11517 Ashley Wed, 29 Jul 2009 16:17:21 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11517 By the way, one of the best dates I have ever went on was simply a day spent at this place that had an arcade, go-cart track, and batting cages. It was SOOOO much fun and made me feel young again. That day will always stand out as one of the best dates ever, even if it was with the ex. By the way, one of the best dates I have ever went on was simply a day spent at this place that had an arcade, go-cart track, and batting cages. It was SOOOO much fun and made me feel young again. That day will always stand out as one of the best dates ever, even if it was with the ex.

]]> By: Ashleyhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11516 Ashley Wed, 29 Jul 2009 16:14:34 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11516 Uh! Other Woman needs to get over it. Are single moms the only people who actually own up to the results of our own actions? Are we the only ones that can see "Okay, I did this, and this is the result?" She had an affair with a married man!! This is not a publicly accepted thing to do. Surely she didn't expect that everyone would be so happy for her in her part in destroying a family? Traditionally, I've learned that if it's not something I'd be willing and okay with telling my parents or pastor I said/did/whatever, then there's a probability that there will be a less than pleasant result or consequence from what I said/did/whatever. It's a fairly simple lesson to learn. It just goes beyond me that she gets her feelings hurt over this when SHE is one of the two people that could have prevented this from ever happening in the first place!! Uh! Other Woman needs to get over it. Are single moms the only people who actually own up to the results of our own actions? Are we the only ones that can see “Okay, I did this, and this is the result?” She had an affair with a married man!! This is not a publicly accepted thing to do. Surely she didn’t expect that everyone would be so happy for her in her part in destroying a family? Traditionally, I’ve learned that if it’s not something I’d be willing and okay with telling my parents or pastor I said/did/whatever, then there’s a probability that there will be a less than pleasant result or consequence from what I said/did/whatever. It’s a fairly simple lesson to learn.

It just goes beyond me that she gets her feelings hurt over this when SHE is one of the two people that could have prevented this from ever happening in the first place!!

]]> By: Anonymoushttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11376 Anonymous Fri, 24 Jul 2009 05:28:10 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11376 Yikes, 23!!! That's child's play!!!!! Run fast Mia and be glad you are no longer in that relationship. This little girl sounds like she wants a lot of attention, even if it's negative attention. How would you like your name being attached to the destruction of a family? I don't know how some people can sleep at night? Mia, you will be happy and loving life, don't let anyone steal your joy!!! Yikes, 23!!! That’s child’s play!!!!! Run fast Mia and be glad you are no longer in that relationship. This little girl sounds like she wants a lot of attention, even if it’s negative attention. How would you like your name being attached to the destruction of a family? I don’t know how some people can sleep at night? Mia, you will be happy and loving life, don’t let anyone steal your joy!!!

]]> By: khttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11375 k Fri, 24 Jul 2009 05:25:25 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11375 You are freakin' kidding me, this "woman" deserves no special props. It may not seem like it now, but in time Mia will look back and be so happy that this other "woman" actually did her a favor. Yes, karma is a biotch too! You are freakin’ kidding me, this “woman” deserves no special props. It may not seem like it now, but in time Mia will look back and be so happy that this other “woman” actually did her a favor. Yes, karma is a biotch too!

]]> By: Andreahttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11373 Andrea Fri, 24 Jul 2009 03:39:01 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11373 Ah fun, this seems so highschool! Its The Hills or what, I think she wants to be famous thru your blog. Hey girl start you own blog, express yourself. xoxo Ah fun, this seems so highschool! Its The Hills or what, I think she wants to be famous thru your blog. Hey girl start you own blog, express yourself. xoxo

]]> By: Michellehttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11362 Michelle Thu, 23 Jul 2009 18:59:05 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11362 Alaina, That she is only 23 makes this even worse. On many points. Pretty much makes me even think less of the ex. She is however old enough to know that someone married is off limits. Flattered as she may have felt that this guy was talking (? do we leave it at that?) to her, she still should have walked away. But it really does place a lot more blame in my perspective on the guy. Why is preying on someone that young? Especially since (I assume) she was single with no kids, she is going to be really immature (not that you can't be immature if you have kids). I really do hope that she comes to her senses and decides she would rather live with herself, than live as an excuse. Alaina, That she is only 23 makes this even worse. On many points. Pretty much makes me even think less of the ex. She is however old enough to know that someone married is off limits. Flattered as she may have felt that this guy was talking (? do we leave it at that?) to her, she still should have walked away. But it really does place a lot more blame in my perspective on the guy. Why is preying on someone that young? Especially since (I assume) she was single with no kids, she is going to be really immature (not that you can’t be immature if you have kids). I really do hope that she comes to her senses and decides she would rather live with herself, than live as an excuse.

]]> By: Ms. Single Mamahttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11361 Ms. Single Mama Thu, 23 Jul 2009 18:02:57 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11361 You are all so awesome. Love this discussion and all of the thoughts. Just wanted to say that this Other Woman is really a girl, only 23. She's a kid. So our discussions and our thoughts here are WAY beyond her. Just an FYI. To me, that's the most infuriating part of it all. And yes, to Kristen's point, I have edited SO much out of this blog about Mia's ex (you have no idea). You are all so awesome. Love this discussion and all of the thoughts.

Just wanted to say that this Other Woman is really a girl, only 23. She’s a kid. So our discussions and our thoughts here are WAY beyond her. Just an FYI. To me, that’s the most infuriating part of it all. And yes, to Kristen’s point, I have edited SO much out of this blog about Mia’s ex (you have no idea).

]]> By: melissahttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11354 melissa Thu, 23 Jul 2009 16:11:38 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11354 That's the right attitude Mia!! Like I said yesterday, the sooner you accept the situation AS IS all will start to seem better. Like it or not, being a single mommy almost always means there will be other women in your childs life. This may be the absolute hardest part of divorce with children. But, for me, I have tried to look at the bright side. Currently my ex (who is in his 30's, people) has a gf who is barely out of high school. It really used to tick me off, but you know what? She really adores my kids, and like as not, I think my kids are safer with their dad since she came into the picture. You have to find a way to accept it. You are right, your daughter will likely meet her one day...it will hurt like hell the first time you see her give this other woman a hug, or to know that she is playing mommy when you can't...but try to think of it as just one more person who may wind up loving your daughter. Whatever the motives are, you MUST find a positive. Accepting single momm-dom means accepting the role other women will play. I adore your writing, and you keep that positive outlook and you will be fine. You are strong, and look at all the women commenting here just for you!! You have support...keep on truckin! That’s the right attitude Mia!! Like I said yesterday, the sooner you accept the situation AS IS all will start to seem better. Like it or not, being a single mommy almost always means there will be other women in your childs life. This may be the absolute hardest part of divorce with children. But, for me, I have tried to look at the bright side. Currently my ex (who is in his 30′s, people) has a gf who is barely out of high school. It really used to tick me off, but you know what? She really adores my kids, and like as not, I think my kids are safer with their dad since she came into the picture. You have to find a way to accept it. You are right, your daughter will likely meet her one day…it will hurt like hell the first time you see her give this other woman a hug, or to know that she is playing mommy when you can’t…but try to think of it as just one more person who may wind up loving your daughter. Whatever the motives are, you MUST find a positive. Accepting single momm-dom means accepting the role other women will play. I adore your writing, and you keep that positive outlook and you will be fine. You are strong, and look at all the women commenting here just for you!! You have support…keep on truckin!

]]> By: Sarahttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11353 Sara Thu, 23 Jul 2009 16:08:15 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11353 I completely agree with Meighan, Rebecca, and Jen C. Maybe the Other Woman shouldn't partake in such despicable behavior and then she wouldn't get crucified in a public forum. I can completely appreciate you and Mia taking the high road and not talking about her for Mia's sake, but seriously how pathetic is the Other Woman for checking on your blog. What?- doing the damage wasn't enough? You need to check back and survey the aftermath of your horrible deeds? You're a terrible excuse for a woman. Your actions disgrace and disgust women everywhere. I truly hope you end up with the same heartache you have caused. Mia I commend your resolve. For you to potentially be able to accept this person into your daughter's life speaks to your high character. You are an amazing woman and the man who left you- good father as he may be- is a coward who doesn't deserve such a strong, beautiful woman. I completely agree with Meighan, Rebecca, and Jen C. Maybe the Other Woman shouldn’t partake in such despicable behavior and then she wouldn’t get crucified in a public forum. I can completely appreciate you and Mia taking the high road and not talking about her for Mia’s sake, but seriously how pathetic is the Other Woman for checking on your blog. What?- doing the damage wasn’t enough? You need to check back and survey the aftermath of your horrible deeds? You’re a terrible excuse for a woman. Your actions disgrace and disgust women everywhere. I truly hope you end up with the same heartache you have caused.
Mia I commend your resolve. For you to potentially be able to accept this person into your daughter’s life speaks to your high character. You are an amazing woman and the man who left you- good father as he may be- is a coward who doesn’t deserve such a strong, beautiful woman.

]]> By: Miahttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/07/21/date-night-2/#comment-11351 Mia Thu, 23 Jul 2009 15:36:40 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=4029#comment-11351 Wagner, That's a good question. At the time of writing the letter my healing had not even started. I consider myself a realist and I know that the day may come when my ex will ask me if the OW can be introduced to my daughter. Despite the poor choices he has made, I know that our daughter's best interest is always in his heart. He adores her. So I would respect his wishes and assume they were in a consistent and healthy relationship. I could not keep her away forever. Ironically, when I met her (long before their relationship began) my daughter was with me and they played together for a long time. At the time I actually thought she would make a good sitter if we ever needed one for a night out. Funny to think about now. As much as it tears me apart I think my daughter would really like her. She is young, innocent looking, and seemed to have a knack with kids. Selfishly, it would rip my heart into a million pieces. But as we all know, motherhood leaves no room for selfishness. And healing would come that pain as well... Thanks again everyone. Now let's get back to happy thoughts and talking about how awesome John Bear is! :) Wagner,
That’s a good question.
At the time of writing the letter my healing had not even started. I consider myself a realist and I know that the day may come when my ex will ask me if the OW can be introduced to my daughter.
Despite the poor choices he has made, I know that our daughter’s best interest is always in his heart. He adores her. So I would respect his wishes and assume they were in a consistent and healthy relationship. I could not keep her away forever.

Ironically, when I met her (long before their relationship began) my daughter was with me and they played together for a long time. At the time I actually thought she would make a good sitter if we ever needed one for a night out. Funny to think about now.

As much as it tears me apart I think my daughter would really like her. She is young, innocent looking, and seemed to have a knack with kids. Selfishly, it would rip my heart into a million pieces. But as we all know, motherhood leaves no room for selfishness. And healing would come that pain as well…

Thanks again everyone. Now let’s get back to happy thoughts and talking about how awesome John Bear is! :)

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