Comments on: Mia’s Story, Part I http://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/ Single Mom Dating? Real advice from a real single mom. Thu, 24 May 2012 06:45:47 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: abrookshirehttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-10497 abrookshire Fri, 19 Jun 2009 15:48:02 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-10497 She will make it through this better than he will BECAUSE she has Sydney. She has a reason to go on and to be strong and to live a respectable life. He's already taken the coward's way and I'm sure he has yet to realize the cost of his actions. She will make it through this better than he will BECAUSE she has Sydney. She has a reason to go on and to be strong and to live a respectable life. He's already taken the coward's way and I'm sure he has yet to realize the cost of his actions.

]]> By: Mia’s Story Part IIIhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-6597 Mia’s Story Part III Fri, 13 Feb 2009 01:17:24 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-6597 [...] Mia’s Story Part 1 [...] [...] Mia’s Story Part 1 [...]

]]> By: A Letter To the “Other Woman”:http://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-6589 A Letter To the “Other Woman”: Thu, 12 Feb 2009 23:38:03 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-6589 [...] Mia’s Story Part 1 [...] [...] Mia’s Story Part 1 [...]

]]> By: Shadows & Lighthttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-6153 Shadows & Light Mon, 02 Feb 2009 04:43:17 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-6153 [...] I left for the trip Mia and I were having one of the many conversations we’ve had lately about dating, men and how we [...] [...] I left for the trip Mia and I were having one of the many conversations we’ve had lately about dating, men and how we [...]

]]> By: Trayhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-5888 Tray Mon, 19 Jan 2009 19:32:55 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-5888 My wife left and took my girls with her and left me with the house and the memories and then was dumped by her boyfriend that she left me for. She is on her third bf now and has this one living with her and my girls, and trying to get them to call him daddy. It's been almost two years, and the pain is still there but it is not as severe. It takes time but you do heal. My focus is on shielding my children from the hurt, and helping them up to be grow healthy emotionally. Stay strong Mia. You are better off without him in your life. Hopefully, he will be there for Mia. My wife left and took my girls with her and left me with the house and the memories and then was dumped by her boyfriend that she left me for. She is on her third bf now and has this one living with her and my girls, and trying to get them to call him daddy. It’s been almost two years, and the pain is still there but it is not as severe. It takes time but you do heal. My focus is on shielding my children from the hurt, and helping them up to be grow healthy emotionally.

Stay strong Mia. You are better off without him in your life. Hopefully, he will be there for Mia.

]]> By: bobbyhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-5717 bobby Mon, 12 Jan 2009 21:30:21 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-5717 I don't know you personally Mia, but I know something about you. You are very strong, even if you don't realize it at times. Seeing what my Mom had to deal with when I was a child, made me realize that singlemom's are very strong because they have to take care of the children. They step up to the plate!! Singlemom's are at the top of my list of people I respect and admire. They are truly champions of children. That means you too Mia! I don’t know you personally Mia, but I know something about you. You are very strong, even if you don’t realize it at times. Seeing what my Mom had to deal with when I was a child, made me realize that singlemom’s are very strong because they have to take care of the children. They step up to the plate!!

Singlemom’s are at the top of my list of people I respect and admire. They are truly champions of children. That means you too Mia!

]]> By: Starhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-5650 Star Sat, 10 Jan 2009 00:23:55 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-5650 Mia, I am now 3 months out from when this happened to me. At first, I called him and talked to him just trying to figure out why I wasn't enough and what the truth had really been while I was oblivious. I felt like I woke up from having amnesia and was being told what my life had really been like. I left my kids with a friend at night and stalked him trying to figure out if he was staying with her and what he was really up to. I was obsessed with what he was doing while I felt like I was trapped by motherhood and he was running free living the life. At this point, I no longer feel obsess with what he is doing and I'm more obsessed with what kind of future I would like and where I should go from here. I'm feeling more capable of raising the kids alone. My 2 1/2 year old also had nightmares of me leaving too since Daddy left. His nightmares have stopped, he's developed a much thicker skin reaction about when I cry or break down (which happens less often) and he is really ok with not seeing his Daddy. We have been away for a month and he doesn't even ask about him. I'm worried about how going back into a visitation schedule will affect him but we'll see. We were living with my parents for the last month and that made me realize that I'd rather raise the boys alone in my own way than live with my parents and have them practically raising them in their own way. That is a big step because I am CHOOSING to do it alone and that feels really good. Before I felt like the decision was made for me and I was very bitter about it. I'm still dealing with the adjustment of how my kids life will have to be very different than the one I had pictured for them but I just want you to know that it does get better a very small step at a time. I'm still a mess and very sad but I'm no longer stalking my soon to be ex or calling him looking for some kind of comfort. That's an improvement. I'm looking forward instead of back. That's a big improvement. Even the nightmares are diminishing. Try reading the twilight series before you go to bed at night so that you have something totally different to think about before you fall asleep at night. It helps. So....things are going to keep getting better. Love, Star Mia,
I am now 3 months out from when this happened to me. At first, I called him and talked to him just trying to figure out why I wasn’t enough and what the truth had really been while I was oblivious. I felt like I woke up from having amnesia and was being told what my life had really been like. I left my kids with a friend at night and stalked him trying to figure out if he was staying with her and what he was really up to. I was obsessed with what he was doing while I felt like I was trapped by motherhood and he was running free living the life. At this point, I no longer feel obsess with what he is doing and I’m more obsessed with what kind of future I would like and where I should go from here. I’m feeling more capable of raising the kids alone. My 2 1/2 year old also had nightmares of me leaving too since Daddy left. His nightmares have stopped, he’s developed a much thicker skin reaction about when I cry or break down (which happens less often) and he is really ok with not seeing his Daddy. We have been away for a month and he doesn’t even ask about him. I’m worried about how going back into a visitation schedule will affect him but we’ll see. We were living with my parents for the last month and that made me realize that I’d rather raise the boys alone in my own way than live with my parents and have them practically raising them in their own way. That is a big step because I am CHOOSING to do it alone and that feels really good. Before I felt like the decision was made for me and I was very bitter about it. I’m still dealing with the adjustment of how my kids life will have to be very different than the one I had pictured for them but I just want you to know that it does get better a very small step at a time. I’m still a mess and very sad but I’m no longer stalking my soon to be ex or calling him looking for some kind of comfort. That’s an improvement. I’m looking forward instead of back. That’s a big improvement. Even the nightmares are diminishing. Try reading the twilight series before you go to bed at night so that you have something totally different to think about before you fall asleep at night. It helps. So….things are going to keep getting better.
Love, Star

]]> By: MakoManhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-5582 MakoMan Thu, 08 Jan 2009 20:07:30 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-5582 Hi Mia, Hang in there and be strong. You are in the beginning of a process that starts with hurt and anger, but the good news is that it always has a happy ending. Any man that can walk out on their child is not worth being with anyway. Down the road he will regret his actions, but by then you will have moved on to bigger and better things. Hug your daughter more than ever and always let her know you will be by her side. Unconditional love is rare, but you will find it. Surround yourself with family and friends and treat yourself to a spa day…..you deserve it. Hi Mia,

Hang in there and be strong. You are in the beginning of a process that starts with hurt and anger, but the good news is that it always has a happy ending. Any man that can walk out on their child is not worth being with anyway. Down the road he will regret his actions, but by then you will have moved on to bigger and better things. Hug your daughter more than ever and always let her know you will be by her side. Unconditional love is rare, but you will find it.

Surround yourself with family and friends and treat yourself to a spa day…..you deserve it.

]]> By: Erinhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-5578 Erin Thu, 08 Jan 2009 17:20:39 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-5578 It's been two years since I was in your shoes and reading this brought me right back. I'm so sorry that this has happened to you, but you are in great company (unfortunately this has happened to so many...shame on these men!) I wish you healing, hope and solace. You can get through this and you will be OK. Allow yourself to feel what you feel, whether that be missing him or wanting to rip out his (and her) throat, its all about the process. Take care Mia, we're all rooting for you! It’s been two years since I was in your shoes and reading this brought me right back. I’m so sorry that this has happened to you, but you are in great company (unfortunately this has happened to so many…shame on these men!) I wish you healing, hope and solace. You can get through this and you will be OK. Allow yourself to feel what you feel, whether that be missing him or wanting to rip out his (and her) throat, its all about the process. Take care Mia, we’re all rooting for you!

]]> By: LTPhttp://mssinglemama.com/2009/01/06/mias-story-part-i/#comment-5569 LTP Thu, 08 Jan 2009 04:23:42 +0000 http://mssinglemama.com/?p=2096#comment-5569 Mia, I wish I had strength to give to you but I'm still healing myself in many ways. I totally get that feeling, wanting, need...to call him even when you know you shouldn't and he's a dog....believe it or not, the person I once loved and that I allowed my children to get close to, has called me the C-word, white trash, all kinds of filth---and yet I still care about him and what happens to him. By the way, this was the man I committed nearly two years of my life to following my separation/divorce--and that amazingly, I thought I would end up spending forever with. So don't beat yourself up too much....it's natural to want to reach out to the person that you've given so much of yourself to--but follow the advice of us all when we say--you are strong, your daughter needs you like no other, and you will get through this....you will. I hope he will at least step up and be the father to his daughter that she will eventually long for, as I did growing up. As I said to a girlfriend the other day, YOU are now in control of this situation--and you make the rules. Do not just let him waltz in and out of her life....your number one priority is your daughter. You can do this....don't underestimate yourself. Sending love.... Mia, I wish I had strength to give to you but I’m still healing myself in many ways. I totally get that feeling, wanting, need…to call him even when you know you shouldn’t and he’s a dog….believe it or not, the person I once loved and that I allowed my children to get close to, has called me the C-word, white trash, all kinds of filth—and yet I still care about him and what happens to him. By the way, this was the man I committed nearly two years of my life to following my separation/divorce–and that amazingly, I thought I would end up spending forever with. So don’t beat yourself up too much….it’s natural to want to reach out to the person that you’ve given so much of yourself to–but follow the advice of us all when we say–you are strong, your daughter needs you like no other, and you will get through this….you will. I hope he will at least step up and be the father to his daughter that she will eventually long for, as I did growing up. As I said to a girlfriend the other day, YOU are now in control of this situation–and you make the rules. Do not just let him waltz in and out of her life….your number one priority is your daughter. You can do this….don’t underestimate yourself. Sending love….

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