Being Social

by mssinglemama on December 18, 2008

I have to get back out there.

It’s been months now since I’ve gone out solo. Nights on the town used to be my forte back in the childless days. I’d come home from work, spend the evening taking a beauty nap and then pop up at 9:00 p.m. ready to hit the city lights, the bars and the men.

I’d travel lightly and keep my plans loose, flowing wherever the evening sent me. I’d spend the next morning sleeping in and lounging in front of the TV curled up in a warm blanket. Usually I’d pick up a magazine, paint my nails and call whoever I’d been out with the night before to reminisce or tell tall tales of what really amounted to nothing at all.

That girl is gone.

But all of the cute vintage purses and high heels she collected are still here, like little ghosts hiding in my closet – but every once in a while, I find the energy to wake them up.

Tomorrow night will be one of those nights.

I have two parties – both for some of my closest friends – so there will be no copping out, no playing of the single mom card and no curfew to meet (my best friend, Mia, will be watching Benjamin) unless I impose one on myself. A hang over or a sleepless night can set me back for days.

I will try to leave my guilt (for neglecting work, my messy house and Benjamin at home.) It is the holidays… and besides every girl, especially this girl, has got to live it up every once in a while…

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{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }

littlemansmom December 18, 2008 at 8:11 pm

You go girl…if anyone deserves a break, you certainly do! Get out there and enjoy! 🙂


Laura December 18, 2008 at 8:16 pm


LOL I have laugh at the self imposed curfew – seems the older I get the longer it takes me to recover from a night out – even a calm one!


Anna December 18, 2008 at 8:31 pm

I partied LAST FRIDAY and I swear my feet still hurt from so many hours in pointy heels! Ugh!

Have a great time…you’ve earned it!


T December 18, 2008 at 9:14 pm

Have a blast girl!!


Erin December 18, 2008 at 9:56 pm

I hope you have a great time!!!


The Dumbest Smart Girl You Know December 18, 2008 at 10:14 pm

Oh, have fun, Mama!


Nat422 December 18, 2008 at 11:19 pm

i know exactly how you feel. i look at all my post-party day memorabilia, all piled in the back of my closet and bittersweet smyphony starts playing in my mind. its amazing how much motherhood changes you. one minute you’re selfish and the next you’re selfless.


solo mama December 19, 2008 at 7:30 am

I know exactly how you feel.

Just last night I went out with my girlfriends for “wine night” and my ex-in-laws had my daughter. Today I am overwhlemed with guilt. Does this feeling ever cease? Does it get better as our children get older? Will is dissapate once we re-marry? Who knows?

What i do know is that we deserve nights out with our friends. We need nights filled with adult conversation and some flirting. We need to remember that we are women. By jump starting our social innards we become better parents, better mothers.

Enjoy your parties tonight and have a very Merry Christmas!


Dawn December 19, 2008 at 7:42 am

Do what it is that you need, that you want … being your own best friend is what this time it’s all about. As for me, I can’t stand the crowds and the bars and find myself happiest at home with a book and a bubble bath. My social interactions are limited to the coffee shop, friends who’ve walked miles through my life, and my children’s teachers. But then again, I’m forty five and I find it hard to get up again when I’ve slipped in the snow!


Mert February 3, 2015 at 7:46 am

Thank you so much for this arectli, it saved me time!


J-fo December 19, 2008 at 8:06 am

Oh geez…go have some fun, for goodness sakes! 🙂


Sheila December 19, 2008 at 9:12 am

Have a good time! I haven’t gone out by myself yet, looking forward to your full report!


Wyliekat December 19, 2008 at 10:11 am

Everyone has to live, and everyone has to go out and enjoy themselves. These are necessities, not luxuries.


shani December 19, 2008 at 10:22 am

In all my years as a single mother, I have always taken some time for me. It has not only helped me to become happier with myself. But it actually makes you a better mother in the process.
Kids need time away from us to learn social skills and we need time away from them to remember that we are more than just a mom.
And even hungover or just plain tired, once in a while, is not any worse than a late night toddler hangover.

Live it up and let him (your son) live it up too.


LB December 19, 2008 at 10:59 am

Have FUN honey-you tottally deserve it!!!


Juggle Jane December 19, 2008 at 11:16 am

Enjoy it! We all need to shake “the mom” off every once in a while!


Jojo's Mama December 19, 2008 at 12:15 pm

Have a Blast For all Of us That Are Way Over Due For A Bitchin Girl’s Night Out!!!


Josefina February 5, 2015 at 3:51 pm

Pleasing you should think of soienhmtg like that


Kelly December 19, 2008 at 12:33 pm

Enjoy! I think we only truly appreciate grown up time once we’ve become single parents!


Solo-Dad December 19, 2008 at 3:13 pm

You go, girl! Get out there and live your life and don’t apologize to anyone for it. 🙂


Nilce February 4, 2015 at 3:48 am

Just to answer Pete’s cemmont.I’ll look into making a plot every once in a while, but unfortunately the snowfall depth measurements are not measured automatically every 15 minutes like the other weather station data so we can’t do the exact same kind of graph.


Leah December 20, 2008 at 11:26 am

Rock those vintage purses and high heels. You go. You’re fabulous and have every right to some on-the-town fun time just for YOU.

Hugs to you, sister.


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