I have to get back out there.
It’s been months now since I’ve gone out solo. Nights on the town used to be my forte back in the childless days. I’d come home from work, spend the evening taking a beauty nap and then pop up at 9:00 p.m. ready to hit the city lights, the bars and the men.
I’d travel lightly and keep my plans loose, flowing wherever the evening sent me. I’d spend the next morning sleeping in and lounging in front of the TV curled up in a warm blanket. Usually I’d pick up a magazine, paint my nails and call whoever I’d been out with the night before to reminisce or tell tall tales of what really amounted to nothing at all.
That girl is gone.
But all of the cute vintage purses and high heels she collected are still here, like little ghosts hiding in my closet – but every once in a while, I find the energy to wake them up.
Tomorrow night will be one of those nights.
I have two parties – both for some of my closest friends – so there will be no copping out, no playing of the single mom card and no curfew to meet (my best friend, Mia, will be watching Benjamin) unless I impose one on myself. A hang over or a sleepless night can set me back for days.
I will try to leave my guilt (for neglecting work, my messy house and Benjamin at home.) It is the holidays… and besides every girl, especially this girl, has got to live it up every once in a while…