A new smile.

by mssinglemama on August 6, 2008

Funny how little I care after seeing him in that much pain. Glad it’s gone. Sayonara dead tooth. Too bad though. Especially after all of the hard work Benjamin put into getting them in the first place… here is teething at 5-months…

And still… gnawing at 8 months.

Not sure when they finally came in. I didn’t have this blog, no journal – everything was moving so quickly. Sucks. But I took a lot of pictures.

These two are from the first year at mom’s. Can’t remember the details of the days as much as I can the feelings that surrounded them. Work. More work. Love. Laughter. Heartache. Work again. Frustration. Anger. Rinse and repeat. And then a release… I adapted.

At least, I like to think that I have. We shall see… have you adapted to single motherhood yet?

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Nicole August 7, 2008 at 12:17 am

No, definitely still in the single mom adjustment period. It’s only been about 4 months, though, so I am being patient. I feel a lot like you mentioned above – many different strong feelings, depending on what is going at the moment. Sometimes I feel a little sad and lonely, and other times I actually feel really lucky that I can spend all my energy on the little guy. Sometimes I am disappointed things worked out with my son’s dad the way they did and I still have some slight hope that maybe eventually he will see what he is missing. Other times, I realize I deserve better, and am excited to meet someone who is really good for me and will accept my situation and love my son as his own. Is there really a point where you just feel at peace the way everything is? I keep telling myself everything will work out the way it is supposed too…

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mama llama August 7, 2008 at 7:37 am

My daughter has been starting to lose her teeth this year, that cute baby-tooth smile being replaced with what seem to be awkward big-girl teeth. I was not prepared for the complete change of her facial structure that accompanies this; she is actually starting to look more like me now! (I got a lot of “adopting from China” comments when my children were babies.)

It is horrible to see your little one in pain. Good Momma, for getting that taken care of.

I am making steps forward with a rather resistent father of my children toward becoming single again. They might seem like baby steps to some; they are big to me in that I have somehow, as of this week, been able to leave emotion out and actually communicate with him for the benefit of the kids on a business-like level for the first time. It’s as if I have made some sort of a breakthrough. I know that doesn’t really count here on your blog, but I count on what you and so many of your readers comment for support and strength–you have no idea.

Be well, Momma-cita.

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randomesq August 7, 2008 at 9:18 am

Ahh, unfortunately, I can not contribute a response to your question but I had to comment to say that the pictures are awesome. I think I had that gap-toothed smile at some point, too.

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mssinglemama August 7, 2008 at 10:17 am

Nicole – your comment just took me back to my first few months. And you know – what – I still have emotional swings like that I just think they dull out after a while – become galvanized and you learn how to control them and finally gain some peace. Hang in there! Give your self the time you need to heal and forgive yourself when you momentarily lose it. Okay?

Mama Llama – that is a HUGE accomplishment. To take yourself out of the situation emotionally and look at it like business – all for the sake of the kids. Keep it up!

Random – thank you!!!

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pisceshanna August 7, 2008 at 11:25 am

Hahah read my blog entry today and see if I’m adapted. *goes insane*

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Alexis August 7, 2008 at 11:28 am

As much as keeping it like business is painful too- it really is the only way when adapting to single motherhood. When I keep it like business, it feels easier to continue on about my day. When I don’t, such as when feel lonely without my son and feel bad that his dad hasn’t asked me to come along, yadayadayada….it gets too painful. I have been in the process of adapting, and it’s gotten easier I suppose. I know I can do it! Sometimes I regress and long for mom, dad, baby to be together…and I hate those times. I just always remind myself that we are OK just the two of us, that we have made a family with friends, each other, outside family…and life goes on. I never planned to be a single mama, but in this life I’ve learned plans never usually work and that is what makes life exciting. SIngle motherhood makes me stronger, wiser, more responsible, hotter, and sexier! (or so I tell myself) The best is- the bond with my son is like no other, he gets all my attention, and I get to live my life however I want…still free in a way! I was given the greatest gift in the world, and every moment with my little guy is amazing and magical…even when I get down. Our children are our soul mates for sure! We can only be thankful for unconditional love i our lives, no matter what!

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Nicole August 7, 2008 at 7:55 pm

Alexis – yes, I completely have those mom, dad, and baby moments, too, and that’s when I feel the worst. However, you are right about single motherhood building character, and yes, it is nice sometimes when my son is with his dad and I have a little bit of free time to do what I please. And, since my little guy is not eating solids yet, I can get away with just eating chocolate for dinner if that’s what I feel like since I don’t have to worry about the opinion of a significant other!!

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Heather August 7, 2008 at 9:56 pm

I’ve definitely adapted. Life is way easier for me now in pretty much every aspect than it was when I was still with the ex. I have struggles (of course), but I can deal with them much easier than I could deal with the issues in my relationship.

I regress from time to time, as well, I think it’s natural. Overall, life is bad-ass for the bambino and me.

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littlemansmom August 8, 2008 at 12:03 pm

Quite frankly, I don’t think I’ve known anything but single motherhood.

……..and I think that he’s got a stunning smile!!

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