by mssinglemama on June 25, 2008
The first question most single parents ask when they finally get back out there on the dating scene is, “C
an I even date someone without a kid?”
The challenges to dating someone without a child can be daunting. Will they ever understand your life? And when they do – will they run away screaming in fear once they realize that parenting never ends? It can also be irritating to date childless people.
They often lack genuine empathy for your situation, talk about stuff that just seems pointless and annoy you with stories about how hard their lives are. But, as one of my friends said recently, “You can’t help who you fall in love with.”
When I left my ex-husband and Benjamin was just four-months-old I couldn’t imagine anyone joining our lives but they did and the relationships didn’t end because I’m a single mom, they ended because child or not we weren’t a good match.
Here are some things you can do to fan the flames of a romance with the single and childless. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on June 25, 2008
This week, I had absolutely zero blog surfing time. Which means I can’t give you a nifty blog recap this week so it’s up to you single parent bloggers.
Leave your link and a brief description of your post. Shamless self-promotion is STRONGLY encouraged.
And a note to my readers: I am reading every single one of your comments, I just haven’t had time to respond to every one. Just didn’t want you to think I’m not pondering, digesting and loving each and every one of your comments. I’m TOO damn busy. Darn it. Someone slow this train down please.
In the meantime, please leave the links to the best of the single parent blogosphere.
by mssinglemama on June 23, 2008
Some things never change …
My basement had a minor flood (not complaining because my little brother lives in Iowa City and has been sandbagging for weeks). Anyhow – while sorting through boxes of wet stuff I found my old journal and stumbled across this entry.
I was leaving Texas after six months there as a single 23-year-old and a morning radio co-host. Needless to say – the cowboys were plentiful and so were the lessons learned. I wrote them down, but didn’t follow them.
September 16, 2003
Lessons I learned here in Texas:
1. Don’t sleep with men – it messes with their heads. They’re better as friends.
2. Don’t date four men at once. You forget who’s who.
3. Hang out with everyone but do NOT trust everyone.
4. Don’t drink too much around co-workers – unless – no, just never. Because most of them are sober.
But sometimes not following the rules leads to little miracles, like meeting a French-Canadian, marrying him and then creating the cutest little boy on Earth who happens to be the best thing that ever happened to me.
[Photo Credit: Yummy Cowboys]
by mssinglemama on June 21, 2008
We all have fears.
If you read my blog, you know I’ve got plenty. Namely my fear of commiting to the wrong guy, my fear of my ex-husband watching our son solo for 36 hours a week or his absence from our lives. I like to think I’ve come leaps and bounds in the past year in conquering them, but I still have a ways to go.
Now it’s your turn to step into the confessional.
Tell me about something that shakes you to your core. Maybe you’re afraid of snakes, men, other parents at the playground, your boss, pickles and bologna, your teenager, asking men out … I don’t care what it is. Describe your fear and then tell me how you are going to conquer it. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on June 20, 2008
Benjamin has this nasty little habit of calling every man in sight “Daddy.”
I’m sure if his father had a greater presence in his life this wouldn’t be the case. I’ve convinced myself, actually, that he does this because I’m a single mom. It’s just killing me. It happens in the grocery store, at the park, on the street, in the car, at his day care and in the coffee shop.
I’ve tried correcting him.
“No, honey, that’s just a man. A man, not a daddy.” And when it’s someone we know, “No, Benjamin that’s not Daddy that’s our neighbor, Ted.”
But to no avail. It’s so bad actually that when I see a man walking toward us on the sidewalk my body actually tenses up. Uh-oh. Here it comes.
“Daddy! Daddy!” He shouts, “Hi, Daaaaddeeeeeee!”
The poor, unsuspecting men usually smile and give Benjamin a big Hello. Then they probably go home and can’t sleep with their girlfriends that night.
Does this happen to anyone else? [click to continue…]
