Single mom for sale!

by mssinglemama on June 30, 2008

Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
redflag1.jpgWe all have them. Our own little list of secret and not-so-secret red flags.

There are the obvious ones like motorcycles, a low credit score, an overzealous attachment to their mother, a diety or political party, small feet, two divorces, an AA membership, yoga addictions … you get the idea.

And then there are the not-so obvious red flags. The subtle killers. You can’t explain them so instead they just live in your stomach, aging and growing until eventually…boom! There they are stuck in the top of your throat. Yuck. Red flags. It’s a love, hate relationship really.

They’re supposed to be blatantly repelling but they’re too easy to ignore. But as a divorced and single mom, I can’t afford not to. That’s a luxury for the single and childless.

Unlike red flags, turn-offs are an instant repellent. In a split moment, a guy you’re attracted to can suddenly turn into a Quasimoto.

My instant turn-offs include belching (yes, I’m old-fashioned), extreme intoxication, long fingernails, smelliness of any kind (except natural man scents), bad kisses and cheesy jokes, I could go on…

What are your red flags and turn-offs?
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
redflag1.jpgWe all have them. Our own little list of secret and not-so-secret red flags.

There are the obvious ones like motorcycles, a low credit score, an overzealous attachment to their mother, a diety or political party, small feet, two divorces, an AA membership, yoga addictions … you get the idea.

And then there are the not-so obvious red flags. The subtle killers. You can’t explain them so instead they just live in your stomach, aging and growing until eventually…boom! There they are stuck in the top of your throat. Yuck. Red flags. It’s a love, hate relationship really.

They’re supposed to be blatantly repelling but they’re too easy to ignore. But as a divorced and single mom, I can’t afford not to. That’s a luxury for the single and childless.

Unlike red flags, turn-offs are an instant repellent. In a split moment, a guy you’re attracted to can suddenly turn into a Quasimoto.

My instant turn-offs include belching (yes, I’m old-fashioned), extreme intoxication, long fingernails, smelliness of any kind (except natural man scents), bad kisses and cheesy jokes, I could go on…

What are your red flags and turn-offs?
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.

We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room – every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad.

Here’s my single moms have everything checklist:

1. Kid

2. House

3. Food

4. Job

5. Reliable babysitter

6. Happiness

What am I missing? Hmmmm…. oh yeah, a man. Oh yeah…

7. Cute, adorable boyfriend who treats you like queen but doesn’t get in your way (this part is a bit risky sooo….)

8. Good judgement (go with the nerds).

So, why not just enjoy it?

There are so many married women right now, out there working their asses off, taking care of their kids AND taking care of their husbands. Call me a man-hater, but imagine convincing a single mom to trade or risk this – contentment, resolve and freedom – for you.

Are you happy being a single mom? Do you even want to get married again?

****UPDATE **** and for the record.

I’m not sure if I want to get married again, because I don’t have time to think about it. Please read some very interesting comments below between Jim and Dad’s House – two single fathers raising some very serious issues to this post. I don’t mean to gloat in my single parenthood. Just trying to make the best of the hand Benjamin and I were dealt. And in my opinion, compared to being with my ex-husband, it’s a fine hand.
** RETRANSMISSION TO CORRECT NAME FROM TRABOSCIA TO TRABOSH ** Deven Trabosh checks her computer for prospects at her home in West Palm Beach, Fla. Thursday, June 26, 2008. Trabosh, a divorced mother of two, has listed her home online in an effort to sell her house and herself. She hopes that whoever buys the house will share her life. (AP Photo/Terry Renna)
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
I’ve been out and about in the single mom dating world for over a year now. I’ve had ups, downs and the spins! Here are a few of the tips I feel compelled to pass on.

And make sure you check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.

  • Date him – ONLY – if you are truly happier. Remember you and your child/ren can be completely content and happy without a man in your life. If a man wants in – he has to earn it.
  • Watch for red flags: lack of goals, laziness, fakeness, cockiness, selfishness or the inability to make you laugh. Everyone has their own set of red flags. Listen to yours.
  • Learn to differentiate between red flags and that nice little “push him away” reflex you’ve developed now that you have a child. Don’t make a big deal out of nothing. Learn to recognize when you are starting to test him. I’ve noticed recently that part of me is wired now to test the men I’m dating. I set them up with baited questions and they either pass or they fail. The test comes in handy but is sometimes unnecessary.
  • Don’t freak him out. Give him his own space to figure out your reality. Make sure he knows you understand this is a lot for him to take in. If he says, “oh, it’s no big deal, a baby can’t be that bad.” Just count to ten and smile. Let the little things go, the big things will follow in their own time.
  • He will not instantly understand your life or be able to empathize with your situation. That would be impossible. Be rational about it and watch for signs of him trying to understand. Is he really watching? Is he really listening?
  • If he’s not calling you frequently or not making future dates – ditch him immediately. You don’t have time for rif raf.
  • Try to resist putting a time line on anything. For ex: “I’ll give him two more months to change.” Not a good idea. People grow and change on their own terms and on their own time. You don’t know his pace, and he doesn’t know yours. Just watch for little signs of improvement on his goals and your goals as a couple.
  • Men are the same. We have just changed. Sometimes this one hits me like a slap in the face. They’re still completely able to fall madly in love with you, commit to you or they’re able to hurt you without even knowing it.
  • It will get easier. I’ve been a single dating mom for 15 months. Each round gets easier. Each one gets better. As long as you’re making improvements on choosing men, that’s progress! And it will get easier to quickly spot the frogs from the princes.
  • Keep yourself out there. Don’t try once or twice and give up. You are shopping. Don’t tell me you would never go shoe shopping again if you bought a few uncomfortable pairs.

Like I said to the man in my life last night, “Benjamin and I have a pretty good life here and anyone who wants to crash the party has to be up to snuff.” His answer, “I completely understand.” He doesn’t really understand but he is trying. Definitely a good sign.

Good luck single mamas! This stuff isn’t easy.

Want more? Check out Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2.
redflag1.jpgWe all have them. Our own little list of secret and not-so-secret red flags.

There are the obvious ones like motorcycles, a low credit score, an overzealous attachment to their mother, a diety or political party, small feet, two divorces, an AA membership, yoga addictions … you get the idea.

And then there are the not-so obvious red flags. The subtle killers. You can’t explain them so instead they just live in your stomach, aging and growing until eventually…boom! There they are stuck in the top of your throat. Yuck. Red flags. It’s a love, hate relationship really.

They’re supposed to be blatantly repelling but they’re too easy to ignore. But as a divorced and single mom, I can’t afford not to. That’s a luxury for the single and childless.

Unlike red flags, turn-offs are an instant repellent. In a split moment, a guy you’re attracted to can suddenly turn into a Quasimoto.

My instant turn-offs include belching (yes, I’m old-fashioned), extreme intoxication, long fingernails, smelliness of any kind (except natural man scents), bad kisses and cheesy jokes, I could go on…

What are your red flags and turn-offs?
It’s not easy to meet good men, especially for busy single moms.

I barely have time to shower, let alone go man hunting. We can’t go out three nights a week like our childless counter parts and if we do meet a man in the coffee shop, at the park or on a fluke night out we usually have to wait at least one week before we can squeeze in a date.

A single mom, so desperate for a “prince charming” (her words) is actually auctioning herself and her home off on eBay and Craigslist. The price? $500,000. Deven Trabosh, 42, has two daughters ages 14 and 21. After years of being single she’s thrown in the towel and has decided to sell herself, a bonus to buying her house in Florida.

“I’m struggling…I don’t want to lose my house and I want to find somebody. So I came up with this dream plan because I’ve always dreamt about being a fairytale princess,” she says.

I love the internet and everything it brings us … connecting all of us, allowing us to sell just about anything – but selling yourself? Being a single mom isn’t that bad, is it?

eBay forced her to take her ad down but she’s still getting plenty of responses including one from an Italian who is flying in to meet her. Check out the entire story here.

What do you think? Her 21-year-old daughter says she doesn’t mind but the 14-year-old is embarrassed by her mom’s actions. I wish her luck, I really do … if someone wants to find a husband than more power to them – but selling yourself and your family?

P.S. Anyone want to put money on the fact that Devon Trabosh will have a realty TV show soon?

Other posts you might like:

[Photo credit: Associated Press]

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Losing you has been quite the gain… | DatingWithaSecret.com
May 23, 2012 at 11:18 pm

{ 28 comments… read them below or add one }

davidrochester June 30, 2008 at 9:38 pm

Um.

I guess I’m wondering how much the house appraised for.

Reply

mssinglemama June 30, 2008 at 9:40 pm

HA!! You’re funny David!!! I think it’s around 200K. : ) Might be in that article.

Reply

littlemansmom June 30, 2008 at 10:23 pm

I heard about this too…I think it’s hilarious! Mind you…I have to wonder if she’s selling herself short….

Reply

mssinglemama June 30, 2008 at 10:30 pm

That’s what I was thinking… I would have asked for at least 10 million. : ) At least…

Reply

Jim Everson July 1, 2008 at 1:00 am

10 million? Hmm. I’m going to need a bigger piggy bank.

Reply

whatmenthink July 1, 2008 at 1:37 am

Selling yourself for money? Theres a term for that…

I understand why her daughter is embarrassed.

Reply

Dan July 1, 2008 at 7:47 am

fer reals?.. but wait…April 1st was already many, many weeks ago..

Reply

mssinglemama July 1, 2008 at 8:12 am

No…I think it’s for reals Dan. I thought this was a hoax too, but it’s been on my news wires …

WMT – yeah, it is like prostitution but she gets to choose the husband and Jim – keep dreaming! : )

Reply

Leslie July 1, 2008 at 9:18 am

Eh? I’d be more than embarrassed, she’s basically selling her kid in the deal, I’d probably ask to move away.

I think I’d rather downgrade the house and keep my soul lol.

Reply

SingleWorkingMommy July 1, 2008 at 11:57 am

I think it’s utterly ridonkulous. She sounds like a real piece of work.

In the longer article, the author called her “Barbie-esque” and said she was “teetering around her home in heels.”

Ugh.

And like Leslie, I worry about her poor daughter.

Reply

kit4real July 1, 2008 at 12:38 pm

Yeah I am in agreement about the embarrassed part, I am embarrassed for her. And yes, 10 million does sound closer to what I would find my life worth…. I mean come on! Well perhaps she can get enough exposure to start up her real estate business again… unless the Italian proves to be her “true love.” But I do wish her the best; and pray I never find myself that desperate!

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PB Gardens guy July 1, 2008 at 12:38 pm

She’s very well known around here for being a flake. I feel sorry for the Italian. He has no idea… From someone with experience.

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PB Gardens guy July 1, 2008 at 12:44 pm

She had a match account with 30 self pictures in almost every pose imaginable.. Hopefully a psychiatric doctor will have an interest.

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mssinglemama July 1, 2008 at 12:48 pm

Oh wow … PB – you know her?

Yes, I think we can all conclude that she’s nuts.

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PB Gardens guy July 1, 2008 at 12:56 pm

You know… She was a nice girl.. But she has always TRIED too hard. Overboard on the surgeries and the dating websites. If she would have stuck to who she was 5 years ago I’m sure she would have found someone of substance by now.

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PB Gardens guy July 1, 2008 at 1:01 pm

I think single woman around the world can take a class from her on what NOT to do. I do wish her luck… But I think the Italian will be sadly dissapointed in a matter of a few dates. Oh.. And I should throw out this discaimer… We dated a few years back and I walked away. Definitely not a disgruntled ex boyfriend here.

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TreeMama July 1, 2008 at 1:36 pm

Yow! I get lonely, but I don’t know if I could put a price on it. I have to wonder what you are looking for when you offer yourself up for sale for that amount.

You have to stop and think about what type of men are going to respond?

I agree the reality show won’t be too far away.

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pisceshanna July 1, 2008 at 1:47 pm

OMG This is nuts! I swear one day EVERYONE will have their own reality show. And yeah PB Gardens guy, she totally looks like a plastic surgery addict. How sad, and come on, what happened to dignity? grace? I thought Colorado was filled with a bunch of gun-lovin nutcases but DAMN Florida really puts the crazies on the map too!

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Trabosh relative July 2, 2008 at 8:20 am

I am a relative and it is really sad. She is selling herself short. Somewhere along the way she got the idea that everyone wanted someone shallow. How sad. She is such a good person inside but she lost her way. Now, she is 46 and a financial mess and trying to figure out a way to live her life. She needs way too much attention. I don’t think its even possible for 1 person to make her happy.

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PB Gardens guy July 2, 2008 at 11:29 am

Trabosh relative…If you are close to her I would probably start reaching out to her now. I’m thinking this is going to blow up in her face and she is going to feel worse. Especially alienating herself in her own town. I would hate to think what she might be thinking her next option could be. Your right though… There was a time when she had it together. Everyone gets sidetracked now and again and she needs someone close to reel her in.

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osolomama July 2, 2008 at 1:41 pm

Piceshanna, I think each person having her own reality show is exactly what Warhol predicted when he talked about the 15 minutes of fame–back in 1968!

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AlLaf July 2, 2008 at 2:25 pm

well, she’s good looking so she’ll find a buyer for sure

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ghfghfgh August 9, 2010 at 7:03 pm

mom for sale 50 cents

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steve March 19, 2014 at 9:56 pm

you still going out

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free August 9, 2010 at 7:05 pm

Mom for sale-Free!!!!!!!!

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Beth December 10, 2014 at 6:33 am

Ummm, a busy mom – I don’t think so. Wakes up late & takes 2 hours to spakle on the make – up. How do I know? I’m one of women with the foolish husband who bought into this crap.
And BTW, she lives on food stamps ( your tax dollars), gets men to pay for her daughters’ expenses ( great role model right?), face lift & boob job and is an identity thief. I know. She harressed me online and tried to blackmail my husband. Not enough that the fool paid her credit cards, sent her & her daughters on trips , paid for cosmetic surgery & trashy clothes and, get this, vaginal tightening cream! and took care of her legal issues.
Some people r so stupid & attracted to trash.

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