Comments on: Did I lose my Mr. Good Enough? http://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/ Single Mom Dating? Real advice from a real single mom. Tue, 14 Feb 2012 00:59:02 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: ApprentieMamanhttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-31093 ApprentieMaman Wed, 14 Sep 2011 10:03:16 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-31093 I'm a relatively "new" single mom, my boyfriend moved out 6 months ago and nearly "forgot" our baby girl's existence! Taking care of everything on my own (while being self-employed) is, as everybody can imagine, no piece of cake, but still easier than living together with my baby's father. I try to remember this when I'm tempted by some online dating. I’m a relatively “new” single mom, my boyfriend moved out 6 months ago and nearly “forgot” our baby girl’s existence! Taking care of everything on my own (while being self-employed) is, as everybody can imagine, no piece of cake, but still easier than living together with my baby’s father. I try to remember this when I’m tempted by some online dating.

]]> By: yesalonenoalonehttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-19608 yesalonenoalone Sat, 04 Sep 2010 01:31:24 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-19608 I would never settle, but I do have to admit, that it is scary to date. I am a single mom, and, although I am in a relationship, I feel that we should take one step back in order to make it to two steps ahead. However, I am scared to do that. I am almost 34 and have only dated a couple of guys since the relationship broke with my son's father. I agree with Tracy, I dont want mr. perfect. I want a mr. perfect for me, which is not easy (although not that hard) to find. However, you have to consider where you are in life. I am almost done with my undergrad and grad degree, and he is almost done his as well. However, there are a lot of stresses with school, kids and personal reactions to situations that are challenging. Not impossible though. I think the hardest part of all of this is learning to work with your bf/gf in all of this. I mean, working in sync to achieve the same results for everyone. Like having my bf step out of being in control and me taking it back. This would help us better to communicate, better for my son so he is able to see that I am still in charge (not the bf), alleviate my bf's stress of his "parental-like-feeling-role" and giving everyone back their own roles. Thanks! I would never settle, but I do have to admit, that it is scary to date. I am a single mom, and, although I am in a relationship, I feel that we should take one step back in order to make it to two steps ahead.

However, I am scared to do that. I am almost 34 and have only dated a couple of guys since the relationship broke with my son’s father. I agree with Tracy, I dont want mr. perfect. I want a mr. perfect for me, which is not easy (although not that hard) to find.

However, you have to consider where you are in life. I am almost done with my undergrad and grad degree, and he is almost done his as well. However, there are a lot of stresses with school, kids and personal reactions to situations that are challenging. Not impossible though.

I think the hardest part of all of this is learning to work with your bf/gf in all of this. I mean, working in sync to achieve the same results for everyone. Like having my bf step out of being in control and me taking it back. This would help us better to communicate, better for my son so he is able to see that I am still in charge (not the bf), alleviate my bf’s stress of his “parental-like-feeling-role” and
giving everyone back their own roles.

Thanks!

]]> By: Chris's Momhttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-14148 Chris's Mom Fri, 06 Nov 2009 02:44:11 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-14148 I almost settled for a 2nd time and just the thought of how miserable I would've been had I not broken it off makes me cringe. Yes, being lonely/dating again is frustrating, but being in a relationship 'just because' is just not worth it. I almost settled for a 2nd time and just the thought of how miserable I would’ve been had I not broken it off makes me cringe. Yes, being lonely/dating again is frustrating, but being in a relationship ‘just because’ is just not worth it.

]]> By: Chantellehttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-10638 Chantelle Mon, 29 Jun 2009 00:14:43 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-10638 Went back and found this blog after listening to you on your show. You rock, you really do. Went back and found this blog after listening to you on your show. You rock, you really do.

]]> By: Jennifer Vierstraetehttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-10387 Jennifer Vierstraete Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:09:05 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-10387 I have embraced being a single mom and do not feel that its a disease. Never in my life have I learned so much about love, life and who I really am. It helps to keep my priorites in check. I would not take this experience back for the world and everyday is an adventure. I refuse to settle on just someone... better to be alone and face the loneliness then with someone and miserable is what I truly feel. I am even more selective on the people as friends that I let in to my life.. I have spent so much investing in my son and I and our home for just anyone to come along ... we are worth it!! So if you are in my life right now, you've been hand picked because you are a wonderful person!! :) and we will shower you with so much love your world will ROCK! I have embraced being a single mom and do not feel that its a disease. Never in my life have I learned so much about love, life and who I really am. It helps to keep my priorites in check. I would not take this experience back for the world and everyday is an adventure. I refuse to settle on just someone… better to be alone and face the loneliness then with someone and miserable is what I truly feel. I am even more selective on the people as friends that I let in to my life.. I have spent so much investing in my son and I and our home for just anyone to come along … we are worth it!! So if you are in my life right now, you've been hand picked because you are a wonderful person!! :) and we will shower you with so much love your world will ROCK!

]]> By: Jennifer Vierstraetehttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-10386 Jennifer Vierstraete Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:03:44 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-10386 I know that men are imperfect.. but lets face it ladies... if we pulled half of their stunts they would of moved on too!!! I'm exhausted right now and had to tell my boyfriend to be there for me when I had an emergency with my son... NOT okay... Men open your eyes and see what your lady is going through... don't make her ask ... it sucks the heart right out of it.... men.. study your ladies become their students and don't be afraid to surprise her... if your afraid then its about YOU and it leaves her unable to open her heart and pour out on you.. YOUR MISSING OUT THEN!! i know I need a man who isn't afraid to take a second place to my son.. and take a lead on our relationship....I don't have the energy to pursue you but once I am I'm sure I would have no problems with breaking out a little love from my side too.... I don;t want a dinner ... I want an apology when you know you have hurt me, for you to take initiative on the conversations we have and to be a little more attentive to me... is this harsh? yes. am I worth it? absolutely. I know that men are imperfect.. but lets face it ladies… if we pulled half of their stunts they would of moved on too!!! I'm exhausted right now and had to tell my boyfriend to be there for me when I had an emergency with my son… NOT okay… Men open your eyes and see what your lady is going through… don't make her ask … it sucks the heart right out of it…. men.. study your ladies become their students and don't be afraid to surprise her… if your afraid then its about YOU and it leaves her unable to open her heart and pour out on you.. YOUR MISSING OUT THEN!! i know I need a man who isn't afraid to take a second place to my son.. and take a lead on our relationship….I don't have the energy to pursue you but once I am I'm sure I would have no problems with breaking out a little love from my side too…. I don;t want a dinner … I want an apology when you know you have hurt me, for you to take initiative on the conversations we have and to be a little more attentive to me… is this harsh? yes. am I worth it? absolutely.

]]> By: jennifer vierstraetehttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-10385 jennifer vierstraete Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:02:39 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-10385 We as single moms cannot afford NOT to be picky!! Settling is like saying you are not worth the pursuit and thats not fair!! Just as men have needs ... so do we and what we need is just as important. For Goodness sakes guys!! Does she have to take you by the hand and tell you everything she wants? She already is raising a child (or children) DON"T make her raise you too!! We as single moms cannot afford NOT to be picky!! Settling is like saying you are not worth the pursuit and thats not fair!! Just as men have needs … so do we and what we need is just as important. For Goodness sakes guys!! Does she have to take you by the hand and tell you everything she wants? She already is raising a child (or children) DON"T make her raise you too!!

]]> By: PT-LawMomhttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-10289 PT-LawMom Fri, 12 Jun 2009 04:51:02 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-10289 I love this post! Mr. V isn't perfect, but he is definitely perfect for me!!! And he's not my "type" so I'm glad I took a leap of faith and tried something different or I never would have known this kind of love. I love this post! Mr. V isn't perfect, but he is definitely perfect for me!!! And he's not my "type" so I'm glad I took a leap of faith and tried something different or I never would have known this kind of love.

]]> By: Khttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-1463 K Mon, 23 Jun 2008 18:06:45 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-1463 that article made me mad too! I've had a few family members who are old and asked what I did to 'ruin' that relationship etc. I don't need that, nor do I need to hear about how I let a 'good one go.' The thing is, timing plays a huge part and if both sides are not willing to put the time or effort in to move the relationship, it WILL NOT work! I mean, I think we all know ourselves well enough to know what's good for us. I'm in a great relationship with someone who is younger and wonderful and starting out school in the fall... I'm going to have to wait through years of school to have my 'perfect' man... but both of us are willing to put in the effort to make those years easy and memorable for our relationship in anticipation of a future together. most guys wouldn't want that... nor are most girls willing to wait, but sometimes you just know. And that's what I spent so long waiting for (keeping fingers crossed too, LOL), so why settle? that article made me mad too! I’ve had a few family members who are old and asked what I did to ‘ruin’ that relationship etc. I don’t need that, nor do I need to hear about how I let a ‘good one go.’
The thing is, timing plays a huge part and if both sides are not willing to put the time or effort in to move the relationship, it WILL NOT work!
I mean, I think we all know ourselves well enough to know what’s good for us.
I’m in a great relationship with someone who is younger and wonderful and starting out school in the fall… I’m going to have to wait through years of school to have my ‘perfect’ man… but both of us are willing to put in the effort to make those years easy and memorable for our relationship in anticipation of a future together. most guys wouldn’t want that… nor are most girls willing to wait, but sometimes you just know.
And that’s what I spent so long waiting for (keeping fingers crossed too, LOL), so why settle?

]]> By: mssinglemamahttp://mssinglemama.com/2008/05/07/did-i-lose-my-mr-good-enough/#comment-1462 mssinglemama Sun, 22 Jun 2008 15:35:52 +0000 http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/?p=395#comment-1462 Very wise words David, thank you for contributing!!! Very wise words David, thank you for contributing!!!

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