Man wanted.

by mssinglemama on April 17, 2008

If I were to write a personals ad here’s what it would say.

Dear Man.

I like you. I really do. I’m just trying to figure out why I need you. So if you want me (and I’m quite a catch) you’ll have to prove your worth.

In order for me to deem you valuable you must be able to:

1. Cook

2. Clean

3. Pamper

4. Love

5. Respect

6. Trust

7. Laugh

8. Intrigue

9. Provide

and…last but not least you must have…

10. A nice ass

Sincerely,

Ms. Single Mama

{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

salvo1279 April 17, 2008 at 5:00 pm

and if i’m gay?

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dadshouse April 17, 2008 at 5:13 pm

you forgot the part about being younger than me, and living closer to you than me… otherwise, I’d be first in line!

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For Prez '24 April 17, 2008 at 5:25 pm

Dear Woman,

All men are ABLE to do the things 1 through 9 on your list; your looking for someone interested in doing them. Thats much harder to find. They’re out there, but probably mistaken for friends.

Good luck,
http://www.QuestioCunctus.com πŸ˜‰

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mssinglemama April 17, 2008 at 5:55 pm

For Prez…I know…darn it.

Tks for the well wishes : ) and very, very good point.

DH – ; )

Salvo … well, then I couldn’t have sex with you so that wouldn’t work but we could be best of friends!

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Cato April 17, 2008 at 6:36 pm

With an ad like that, you’re going to be waiting a loooonnnnggg time for responses.

Almost every woman (and almost every man, for that matter) thinks she (or he) is a great catch — and they are, for somebody.

The difficulty is most of us seriously overestimate our desirability to the opposite sex, so we’re constantly lusting (in the best sense) after people whom we see as good catches from our perspective, but for whom we do not fall within the parameters with which they define a good catch.

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SingleMomSeeking April 17, 2008 at 6:53 pm

What if you rephrased it?…

“I want a man who’s a match for me. I’m an independent, intriguing, full of life woman — who’s looking for her equal. You can find me cooking and cleaning with just as much energy as you’d find me loving and pampering? Does that describe you, too?”….

You get the point. This sounds like a list (dare I say a bit defensive?). I think that if you put yourself out there — hey, this is me! — you never know… Just a thought darling.

P.S. I live closer to Dad’s House, sorry!

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mssinglemama April 17, 2008 at 7:59 pm

You guys! I was kidding … this was supposed to be funny. I wrote in in like two minutes before between loads of laundry, hence cooking and cleaning at the top of the list.

I would NEVER really put this up. Laugh a little…anyone?

I’m not even thinking about matching up with anyone right now. Done and done with that for a while.

But very, very good advice Cato and SMS.

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Red Wine Gums April 17, 2008 at 8:35 pm

*takes down Craigslist ad*

Nothing to see here. Move along

πŸ˜‰

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jon b April 18, 2008 at 9:59 am

I disagree with Cato. I, for one, likely underestimate my attractiveness to the opposite sex. Not to be arrogant, but there is nothing wrong with recognizing one’s own self worth.

I’m a good man, I know it, and I will be treated as such, or you can go find the door. My girlfriend is a wonderful woman and makes me feel loved and appreciated, we talk all the time, and are not afraid to be ourselves around eachother. What’s wrong with wanting that?

There’s nothing wrong with being your own Number 1 Fan. πŸ™‚

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jon b April 18, 2008 at 10:01 am

Although I do wish I had a nicer ass. πŸ™

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dadshouse April 18, 2008 at 1:20 pm

I liked your ad! You said nothing about you. Instead, you talked about the things that were important to you. That let’s a man know how he can fit into a relationship with you. He’ll decide when he meets and gets to know you whether he finds you attractive or not.

btw – I found point 8 in your list most intriguing

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mommypie April 19, 2008 at 5:08 am

Okay, if it makes you feel better, I totally got your humor. Too bad Z didn’t comment on this one — that would’ve been some SERIOUS comedy. HA!

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pseudonymblog April 20, 2008 at 3:40 pm

You forgot Money!!

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randomesq April 20, 2008 at 10:55 pm

Heh. I dig the humor in the list. I’d probably find it hilarious and e-mail you. Or buy you a house. Who knows? I’m impulsive sometimes.

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randomesq April 20, 2008 at 10:55 pm

And hey! Where’s “Be Funny And Bring Money?”

It’s my number one rule for takin’ out a women! πŸ˜‰

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mssinglemama April 20, 2008 at 10:58 pm

Oh yeah! You’re right … the best dating advice ever! Be funny and bring money. Tks for reminding me. : )

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AlLaf May 29, 2008 at 2:32 pm

Cook, clean,Β provide…wow, you’re needy.

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mssinglemama May 29, 2008 at 2:37 pm

You should read more of my blog before you jump to so many conclusions.

I am quite the opposite of needy – I don’t NEED a man at all. If one discovers that he needs me, then he better be able to help out around the house or make my life easier in some way. If he doesn’t – why in the hell should I bother having a man at all?

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AlLaf May 29, 2008 at 3:08 pm

So to you a man boils down to someone who should help you around the house?

That’s quite romantic. Are you 50 years old? What happened to being with someone because you simply love that person?

Expecting something from people is being needy. Well, the proper word would be demanding. As someone who’s apparently independant, I don’t see why you’d require anything from a man. In fact, since you happen to have a kid, you should be quite the opposite. Denying that is denying reality.

Anyway, good luck with that little checklist. I’m sure you’ll find love.

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