by mssinglemama on March 24, 2008
*UPDATE*
Read his response here. Unfortunately he didn’t answer our question. But, hey, can you blame him? It’s a tough one.
Dear Random Esquire,
We’re kind of embarrassed to admit this, but we’re glad you discovered us. We’re also glad that we’ve sparked what seems like a minor fascination, on your part, in single moms. It’s flattering, but it also has us both questioning your motives.
Rather than send this via e-mail, we wanted to shed light on the obvious nuances we’ve all been leaving in comments on each other’s blogs. We don’t like keeping our readers in the dark, especially when there’s a chance for them to learn a few of our own lessons as single dating moms.
So who are you?
[click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on March 24, 2008
Okay. This is a tad horrifying.
Last week I offered my video camera to Benjamin’s father. He was also having a birthday party for him. I had videotaped my party for Benjamin, so why not give his dad a chance to do the same? Tonight I got the camera back and on it is a nice little tour of my Ex’s girlfriend’s trailer. (She’s also a single mom by the way. Her son is six. Irony anyone? Pity. Yeah. Got that too.) I’ve never actually seen the place so my Ex decided to give me a virtual tour.
Scene 1:
Grandpa on lazy boy. He’s wearing camoflauge. His stomach is larger than a bean bag.
Benjamin is throwing a balloon in the air. Grandpa is not reacting. He pulls his shirt up and yes, scratches his massive white ass belly.
Scene 2:
Grandma smiles and waves at the camera. She looks sweet. Much more alive than grandpa. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on March 23, 2008
We’ve all met them and most of us have unfortunately fallen for one of them, or in my case, several of them - men who are complete heels.
The worst of the worst, they have actually taken the time to understand women, know our vulnerabilities and then they suck us in with the illusion that they may be the perfect man.
This is all according to Daphne Merkin who wrote an article in The New York Times this weekend that sums it all up. “Like four inch stilettos,” she writes, “these men make you feel good just by being part of your person, like the most enticing accessories.”
Please, please, please read this entire article. I don’t think I’ve ever read such an accurate portrayal of some of the men I’ve encountered out there. But I’ll try my best to sum it up. Here goes…
Before defining the heel Merkin first defines “the less damning subspecies of lethally seductive men known as cads and jerks.”
[click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on March 22, 2008
You’re the freakiest little train with a face only a mother could love. But my son has been playing with you all afternoon. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I forgive you and your freaky little train friends for being so damn freaky looking.
________
Sounds like Mamma Cum Laude will be going into labor any day now!
________
Benjamin is through his teething (I think) but he’s still acting like a fussy little monster 70% of the time, an improvement over 100% of the time. So I’ll take it but obviously I don’t have much time to write/think.
by mssinglemama on March 21, 2008
Benjamin is teething. He’s been feverish and super fussy for five days straight now. I think I’m going to lose my mind. In these moments I do have secret husband fantasies:
“Hey, honey could you watch our extremely needy child right now so I can just sit down for three minutes?”
“Sure, sweetie…actually why don’t you go get a hair cut and a manicure - it has been four months now.”
I counted his teeth tonight. He has 20 … so not sure if those last four broke through this week because I didn’t count them last week. Sigh. Crossing my fingers he’ll be back to normal by tomorrow.
_____
We don’t have a TV. I lost it in the divorce (of course, he had to have the TV) and didn’t buy a new one. I have an iMac. A 20″ iMac. Everything I want to watch is online. Nice. And a commercial free life is a wonderful life. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on March 20, 2008
There’s a very interesting comment thread going on how much I love being a single mom….
It’s a fantastic discussion between Dad’s House and another single father, Jim. They’re debating on whether or not our children, the children of single parents, are essentially worse off because they’re being raised by single parents….very passionate stuff here. And a few things to keep in mind - every situation is unique and everyone is entitled to their own opinions and because we are all single parents we must respect everyone’s opinion because in this discussion - unfortunately no one has the answers. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on March 19, 2008
by mssinglemama on March 19, 2008
You rarely hear mention of him on my blog. Maybe because it usually breaks my heart to write about it. Maybe because I don’t want Benjamin to read this someday and think his father’s a lousy (enter superlative of your choice here). But now that Benjamin’s two…soon there will be questions which means Mommy needs to figure some stuff out. And I prefer to turn to the experts - you, my readers and open this up for discussion. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on March 17, 2008
I was beaming with pride last night. I bought Benjamin his first Thomas train set for his birthday. After I spent 30 minutes setting the track up perfectly to fit his little bedroom play table, he spent an hour choo chooing the trains around.
This morning (like every Monday) his father came to pick him up. I called this afternoon to see how they were doing.
“Oh, we’re great!” Ex says, “he’s playing with Thomas right now and watching an Elmo movie.”
“What?,” I press, “He’s playing with his new Thomas track? At your house? You took the entire set with you?”
“Yeah, is that a problem?”
Sigh. Now I have to set it up again so it fits on the table. And what if the pieces get lost? And…well, should there really be such major toy transfers for a 24 hour sleep over at Dad’s? And isn’t that kind of like cheating? Taking the toys I got for him … knowing full well that had he missed them for 24 hours he would have come home all excited and been occupied for hours.
Help! Need advice from other single parents on this one. I guess when Benjamin is older this could be an issue. Explaining to him that - no - you can’t pack up an entire car worth of toys to go to daddy’s. Or, should I let him? Really clueless on this one.
by mssinglemama on March 17, 2008
Kris and I manage to go out on an actual “date” about once a month.
Last night was one of them, our first since Valentine’s Day. But when we do get out it’s always so romantic. There’s some serious anticipation, excitement and then pure giddiness at being out for a
night on the town. Last night we went out to dinner and then danced like crazy people to a jazz funk band. (Oh and the boy can dance). God it was fun. The perfect evening. I know if I weren’t a single mom there’s no way I would be able to appreciate these date nights as much and neither would he.
And although Kris insists that dating a single mom is easier than dating a “clueless young chick” there are still some major, well, how should I put this, differences our men have to endure to be with us. Endure or, should it be enjoy? Hmmmm….depends on the guy and his attitude.
Some of the things a man dating a single mom endures or enjoys:
1. Sitting down on couch and landing on gooey cookie.
2. The baby monitor. I don’t think I need to elaborate here.
[click to continue…]
