From the monthly archives:

February 2008

Getting over it.

February 12, 2008

My best friend is still trying to move on from a rough break up…and she’s a single mom. I’m running out of advice for her … and feel like a broken wheel. “It will just take time, you’ll be okay, he was a jerk anyway.” But in the here and now she’s hurting. And I’m running out of comforting words. I thought it might be nice to get some fresh perspectives – like yours!

We are all single mothers. And that means we’ve all dealt with a failed relationship or two. How do you cope? Are there any ways to make the pain go away a bit faster? How long do you wait to start dating again?

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Obama’s Single Mama

February 12, 2008

I finally found it. A story about Barack Obama’s single mother, Ann Dunham who was only 19 years old when she had Barack and 21 when her husband left her. I had seen this photograph, one that nearly brought me to tears, if only because of her face…so proud, so strong, so happy, despite the fact that she was a single mother. In the preface to a new edition of “Dreams From My Father,” Obama’s story of finally reconnecting with his father and his relatives in Kenya, Obama writes of his mother, “what is best in me I owe to her.” Ann Dunham died of cancer in 1995, she was only 52 years old.

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Why we kiss and how to kiss.

February 11, 2008

A first kiss speaks a thousand words…or more like a million. And new research confirms what we all know anyway – a bad kiss means there probably won’t be a second one. A study published in Scientific Amercan found that 59% of men and 66% of women lost interest in someone after a first kiss went poorly – why? because it just didn’t feel right.

“The reason a kiss carries such weight is that it conveys subconcious information about the genetic compatibility of a prospective mate,” says the article. The study’s author thinks his research shows that kissing evolved as a courtship strategy because it “helps us rate potential partners.”

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Does romance really exist?

February 8, 2008

As Valentine’s Day approaches it’s got me thinking about romance and the idea of romance. When it comes to romance – the ball is usually in the man’s court, because society tells us it should be. But personally, I can count on my hands the number of men who have actually done anything “romantic” for me. Somewhere along the line I just stopped expecting flowers, chocolates or sweet nothings – leaving those fantasies of romantic gestures behind with my youthful optimism. But when you’re a woman it’s not easy to lower your expectations. And should we? Or should we just take a look at our definition of romance?

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Thomas would kick Mickey Mouse’s ass. Elmo would watch.

February 7, 2008

In hopes of preventing my son from unnecessary and costly material obsessions – I have limited his exposure to all typical child fascinations. But all of the following have somehow slipped in. Benjamin, just shy of two, has now developed fascinations with Thomas, Mickey and Elmo.

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One step back…two steps forward?

February 6, 2008

The past few days have been rough. I guess our split hadn’t really hit me and when it did – it hurt. Not because I was losing a boyfriend but because I was losing my best friend. I started to wonder – why is this happening? What happened to our fun, casual relationship? When did it become so serious? And when did he start feeling all of this pressure? All of the answers pointed back to me. I had been pressing him for goals…nagging him about his college-esque lifestyle and asking him to be more helpful around the house. Had I lost my mind? No. I had just lost touch with reality and lost sight of what I want and expect from Kris.

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Shacking up…with another single parent.

February 6, 2008

With single parenthood on the rise, many single moms and dads are shacking up – with each other. Once I dated a single father who lived with two other single fathers. His house had a climbing wall from the kitchen to an upstairs playroom. The kids had each other and so did the fathers.

My single mama best friend, Abby, also just split her rent in half by taking in a roommate – another single mom. They found each other through Craiglist and in addition to being a great roommate, Cindy has also offered to baby sit and will undoubtedly help Abby out around the house.

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If you haven’t seen it yet – the funniest Super Bowl ad ever!

February 5, 2008

This is SO funny…this ad was watched (Tivo’d) more than the game itself. Babies Rock!!! And so does this ad. Don’t know about you, but I could always use a good laugh. Enjoy!

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Single Mamas for Obama!

February 4, 2008

This single mama is 100% behind Barack Obama. If you have a minute – read this article to find out why. Here is an excerpt from the article by Andrew Sullivan of The Atlantic: “Sometimes, when the world is changing rapidly, the greater risk is caution. Close-up in this election campaign, Obama is unlikely. From [...]

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A bittersweet good-bye.

February 4, 2008

A few hours after writing my last post…I got a call from Kris. He felt horrible about the way the dump went down and wanted to see me. I said – no way. I didn’t see the point. What good could come of it? Was he going to come over and dump me again? He told me to call him if I changed my mind and then 20 minutes later he called me.

“I’m on my way over – I have to see you.” Two minutes later there was a knock on my door. It was late. I was tired. But we talked. First he started with an apology and then he said it, “you know I really love you, right?” I told him I didn’t think he really knew what love was. But then I saw it in his eyes. And he does. Then as we talked about why he had come to this decision everything came out. The truth about his feelings.

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