Comments on: Single Mom Dating Tips, Part 2

By: Britt8706

Britt8706 — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 20:28:29 +0000

Hi Yall. I have been a single mom since my daughter was born it feels like i was married but he was to high and drunk to care. We been separated for 1 yr and 3 mo. He wont sign the papers. anyways. At the time i met my now bf i was working at a bar. Him and his roomate where regulars i loved serving them cause they werent creepy and tipped well and listen to my problems. So by the time my bf asked me out he knew i was techanly married altho my husband live 2,000 miles away he knew i was a single mom. And still asked me out. We took things slow told him up front he would not meet my daughter for at least 3 mo and she is first in my life then work.
He got up at 6 to go to work and i was getting off at 3 he would stay up just to talk to me. After 2 mo he asked if i would wanted a dayjob the company he works for is hiring! i said sure I am a field clerk now he a project engineer. At 3 months i said i am ready for you to meet Haylee she was 15 months old he was great w her they still on interacted once or twice a month for the next 4 months.
o and ps i was living w my inlaws for the 1st 4 mo.
He started regaulary coming over twice a week hung out w me saw how i was w haylee helped out when he could. its been 10 mo now and last night she woke up cause of a loud noise he went and got her and rubber her back till she feel asleep.
This Man has put up w so much from cancelled dates cause Haylee was sick or no sitter to me taking her to see her dad and trusting me to stay there. He has been amazing. I feel so lucky. Altho he not ready for marriage yet he 27 he knows i want to have another kid and be married at 25. I dont want kids after 25 and i told him you know what i want you dont think you can give it to then let me know now. I also have trust issue from my past marriage he cheated on me all the time w my friends. So i looked thro my bf cell last week found somethink that i didnt think was respectful not him but a girl from his home town was calling him babe and saying i miss you so on… i told he i looked tho ur text i saw this i dont like this its is not respecting our relationship nor me and i will not put up w it. He said i am sorry i didnt know you would take offence to that i am not cheating on you i am so sorry i hurt you. And hugged me a long w the fact he never got mad for me invading his privacy. That to be show maturity. We get along great never yell at eachother always have fun. And some guys dont say there feeling they do lil things just like being there when u need someone to fix ur heater or ucar dies and u need someone to pick up you daughter.
I say all of this to say there are great guys out there who will love you for you and your kid. And just like my bf when he decibes me one of the 1st things he says is she the best mom!

By: Cherron

Cherron — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 20:06:25 +0000

Val makes a good point. I’m 24 and the single mom to two girls. So my biggest problem with dating is trusting the men. I’m borderline paranoid when it comes to my kids.

Oh, and I definitely call too much. Its like a drug talking to another adult about adult things.

By: Val

Val — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 17:27:58 +0000

To Melissa……… Just have to say…with dating any man esp. in the beginning, be very careful and watchful regarding him wanting to meet your kids to soon. There are a lot of freaks out there and like to prey on a single mom’s loneliness and vulnerability . Above all, TRUST your gut instincts!

I dated a man for a few months, he came to pick me up for a date (asked to use the washroom) and after a time when he didn’t come back from the washroom, I tipped toed up the stairs only to find him in my daughter’s bedroom going through her panty drawer!! A few weeks later I received a phone call from the police, he had been arrested for possession of child pornography, photos and on his personal computer and they had gotten my name from his email list.

So just be very watchful, observant and trust how you’re feeling!

By: melissa

melissa — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 00:23:30 +0000

I have been a single mom for a year and a half. I started to online date about 6 months ago. I realize alot of guys say they dont care about you having kids till it comes down to the relality of it. Then on top of the getting burned so many times im very weary of men, but about 2 and a half months ago i started to talk to this guy. We talk for 2 months then meet for the first time 2 weeks ago, we have really hit it off, im scared to trust again, and im afraid to get serious, he seems extremely excited about meet my kids sometime. any advice?

By: jules

jules — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 03:17:37 +0000

I have been a single mom for 6yrs now, and during those 6yrs i had a 1 yr relationship, that ended very badly. I have been very cautious in letting anyone come close to me. But recently met a man who has full custody of his 9yrs old daughter. Things are going great..we speak everyday and text in the morning..he understand my situation, we only see each other once a week…and i already feel connected to him but a part of me is scared and is worry about where this is going..It so hard doing it on my own especially now that i just turned 34 and want someone to be there for me…my daughter on the other hand doesn’t want to hear the word that mom has a boyfriend..she said we are fine just the two of us…my daughter has never had a father figure and this man he is so great with his daughter..my advice is don’t lock yourself away from the world..be honest..live..choose carefully and be ready to let go..if it doesn’t work out..

By: Sara

Sara — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 20:41:07 +0000

I have been dating a man since my daughter was six months old, she will be starting JK in 3 weeks. BF loves us both very much, we spend alot of time with his extended family, he is a very ambitious hard working man that comes from a solid christian home. However, after 4 years in this relationship he still shies away from talk of marriage, children or a mortgage. he has adapted and grown ALOT in the past 4 years to fit into our lives but I still feel like there’s something lacking.

Do I give him an ultimatum? wait it out? bail?

By: janie

janie — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 22:14:58 +0000

I do that too! Delete…..and sometimes you may be suprised:)

By: lisa

lisa — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 08:00:28 +0000

I am a a single mom, and being one has made me think of my own mom who was a single mom. One thing she did whe she dated was not include my sister and I in her relationships. She dated one man for 12 years and looking back we never coonected as one unit – family. He lived with us, but I can not remember having a conversation about him coming to live with us, nor a conversation about him moving out. I guess what I am trying to say is that for me, i want to date and acutually marry, but my relationship with my mate will have to naturally include my son….

By: Freespirit21a

Freespirit21a — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 19:22:02 +0000

I think that the best way is to tell him that you have a very personal and special thing to share with him but you wanted to wait until the moment was right. Hopefully he is open and understanding, and then you can proceed to tell him about your young one and how it was important for you to "test the waters" before you let him in on a more personal aspect of your life. Check it out and see what happens…if he freaks that is his loss and he doesn't deserve to know you or your 4yr old. I wish you all the best.

My personal advise to anyone meeting someone new, is to tell them upfront, that way they know what they are getting in to right away.

By: christofts

christofts — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 04:22:40 +0000

Hi, I am a 27 year old single mother, and have met this lovely hot guy 6 months older then me. We met at a sporting event and have been texting and e-mailing ever since. Now I don't know how to tell him I have a 4 year old. I am pretty sure he will freak out.! Im very nervous as he is so nice. Is there any gentle way?