by mssinglemama on January 30, 2008
One downside to dating a single mother - you get sick. Really sick. The last time I saw my boyfriend, Kris, he was his healthy, energetic, happy, nerdy self…I was laying on the couch feeling very, very ill. He kissed me good-bye. Two hours later he called me - sick as a dog. That was four days ago.
He’s been in a sleepy, feverish haze of pain ever since.
The day care germies must have jumped him late last week when he came over to help me watch Benjamin.
Why? Because I asked him too.
Why? Because I was starting to feel sick.
Sigh. I feel guilty. I usually don’t feel guilty - but I can’t express to you enough the pain of this particular viral strand. It’s unreal.
This entry is a kudos to Kris who is - as we speak - trying to study for his midterms amidst a severe fever that’s giving him hard core chills. You are an inspiration to all of the completely single moms (and single women) out there.
Good guys do exist. And they don’t even complain about you making them sick. They suffer through it and always take the time to ask - “how’s (insert your child’s name here)?” Nice. Very nice indeed.
What’s the most a man has endured for you? Do tell. Time for some inspiration. I’m starting to feel better by the way. Went out and got some zinc today - very helpful.
[The photo: From Discovery Health - where you can find on how colds are spread. Go figure.]
by mssinglemama on January 29, 2008
Benjamin and I spent 4 hours in urgent care today. 4 hours! Between chasing Benjamin and keeping him entertained my mind did have a few minutes to wander.
I thought about my father. He was a doctor and all hospitals bring his memory back front and center. I imagined what our lives would be like if he hadn’t died of cancer. First of all - I know we wouldn’t have to be in this horrible urgent care, waiting for hours and hours. I daydreamed about talking to him on the phone - telling him about my day, about Benjamin, about Kris.
Then the thoughts stop. They have to stop - Benjamin has disappeared down the hall - he’s deep into the radiology department. Ironic. Yes. Annoying. More so. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on January 27, 2008
Both of us are sick…again. Since Benjamin started day care last September he’s been sick on and off ever since. This time it’s some nasty, rotten head and stomach cold thing that’s had us miserable for four days now. Each one of these day care bugs is unique. I’ll spare you the details but it’s a little bit freaky. Never, ever in my life have I ever been so sick, so often. It has me considering trading day care for in-home care. But, he’ll be starting montessori this fall so I want him to stay in a school-like environment.
[click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on January 24, 2008
This is for the guys. Because so many of you are turning to my blog for insights into the female mind I’m going to give you the secrets. Ladies please add to my list by leaving a comment. The more the merrier.
This list is based on years and years of listening. I’ve been listening to both women and men. The topic of dating - what draws us to each other and what turns us off - has always fascinated me. (I know, I’m weird but my loss is your gain). So here goes…this one is for all women - child or not … see below for the single mom addendums. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on January 23, 2008
My best friend and fellow single mom, Abby, is still reeling from her break up. And so is her 5 year old daughter, Penny. She’s a beautiful, happy little girl who also fell in love with mommy’s boyfriend. How couldn’t she? He was over at their house at least three to four nights a week. They’d been together for nearly one year and had been talking about moving in together, starting a family - the whole kit and caboodle. And now - poof - he’s gone and Penny is broken hearted. If you’ve never seen a 5 year old with a little broken heart - lucky you - because I saw my first one tonight and it was unbearable. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on January 21, 2008
I’ve had a rough day.
I didn’t get dumped but my best girl friend did. And she’s a single mom. Needless to say I want to kill the guy (not really FBI guys, but I do want to punch him in the face).
Instead of ranting about what a jerk her now ex-boyfriend is I’ve decided to channel my negative energy into a cynical but hopefully interesting post.
I have a theory - how we break up with someone is a true reflection of our character.
Here are some of the most common ways to break up with someone (in my dating experience) - guess which one the guy used on my single mom friend?
by mssinglemama on January 20, 2008
The founder of Craigslist.com, Craig Newmark, says it often in interviews…”nerds make better lovers.” When I first read this I giggled to myself because I have been happily dating nerds now since becoming a single mother. Since switching to nerds the cool, suave guys don’t even phase me anymore. This is coming from a woman who used to date the hottest, slickest guys out there.
So with that said…here’s why nerds make better lovers:
- It’s all about you…all of the time. Nerds always, always make sure you’re satisfied. Can’t emphasize this one enough. Why? Because if a man doesn’t take the time to satisfy you in bed do you really think he’ll take the time to satisfy you outside of bed? [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on January 19, 2008
Yes, there are downsides to being a single mom.
We have to cook every meal, change every diaper, deal with every tantrum and clean every room - every day, 365 days a year. But I absolutely love being a single mom. Why? Because I’m happy. I don’t really know how to explain it but I’ll try…this no husband thing really isn’t that bad. [click to continue…]
by mssinglemama on January 17, 2008
Not unless you do.
The question should be “Do you think men really care if you’re a single mom?” If the answer is no - you’re good to go. If not … keep reading.
When I started to date again, 5 months after my husband and I separated, I could imagine the end result - a sweet husband, a sweet father. But how would I get there? How would a man not run away screaming after spending more than one day with my feisty little baby? What if he saw me change a poopy diaper? What if Benjamin threw food in his face? And how would I even find the time to date him?
I didn’t think any man could actually handle that. But in reality - it was me.
I couldn’t imagine them entering our lives…so I never let any of them get in. I was pushing them away. More importantly, my desperation was pushing them away.
In the end it was a man who made me see the light.
This past summer I had a fun fling. He was super sweet and completely smitten with me. It was only because he was “safe and non-threatening” that I was able to let him see everything - me changing diapers, me covered in messy baby food, me cleaning the house, me being with my son.
In the end we broke up mutually and we’re still friends - he was a great guy! The lesson he left me with … men can fall in love with single moms - and just like always - when a man falls for a woman, they fall hard. And that whole kid thing? It’s icing on the cake.
This is all true if you’ve got a good one. The jerks will fall away and some may hurt you in the process but over time you’ll be better at spotting them
Have you pushed men away? Do you still feel desirable?
by mssinglemama on January 15, 2008
I love my adorable toddler and I love my adorable boyfriend…oh, and I love my amazing job. I love them all so much I just don’t want to sleep as much as I should. Life is too good but my life is also incredibly tiring. What’s a single mom to do? Say no to the boyfriend. Nope. That’s not going to happen. After all good lovin’ is one of my favorite things in life. Can’t pass that up.
How about the toddler - could tell him to chill out with a good book so mommy can take a nap. Nope. And the job - well, can’t quit that. Does anyone have any energy tips? [click to continue…]
