Single motherhood – turns out, not so easy, but not so tough either.

Being a single mom is tough. But like anything else in life – you get used to it. you adapt, you become stronger and you survive. You also have the power of love on your side – the love you feel for your child is stronger than anything you’ve ever felt – it compels you and drives you day in and day out.

This topic comes to mind today because it’s now the 7th day I’ve had to stay home from work because Benjamin is sick…again. First he had a bacterial infection (nasty cold), then a viral infection (high fever) and now conjunctivitis (pink eye). His father has yet to fix his car, so it’s now been four weeks since we’ve seen him. Keep in mind, other than my ex-husband, I have no one. No family in town. My best friend who’s also a single mom helps out often – but she works too.

It’s the day in and day out duties you assume that can catch up to you if you don’t surround yourself with friends. It’s why I usually have them over two or three nights a week. This way I save money on babysitting and get some healthy adult interaction.

I’ve already told you why I love being a single mom. And I would never have it any other way but today I need to vent about the downsides. Just need to blow some steam.

The toughest aspects of single motherhood:

1. It’s all on you. Everything. The groceries, the doctor’s appointments, the clothes shopping, the bills.
2. I haven’t slept in (for free) in 20 months. A few times I’ve paid a sitter to stay over night so I could sleep in…but by sleeping in I mean 8:00 a.m.
3. I have cleaned the kitchen every night, by myself, for 20 months.
4. I have done every load of laundry, every bathroom scrub down and cooked every meal.
5. I have to discipline him on my own.
6. He gets bored with me …this could all be in my head, but I just think if he had more than one parent around he would be a bit more entertained.
7. I can’t give him enough attention. As a single mom you have to make choices. Cook the kid’s dinner or play with him. Hmmm….food. This is just one example.

Okay, now I feel a bit better. And now looking at that list – it doesn’t seem so tough.

The hardest part of all is the idea that I am the only one, the only one who truly knows my son. But even that doesn’t sound harder than being married to his father – that was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Being miserably married is much harder than being a single mother – I can guarantee it.

Tagged as: babies, family, single mom, single mother, single motherhood, toddlers