Comments on: Am I Single Mother By Choice?

By: chris

chris — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 00:14:33 +0000

DMS does not make sence. I dont know if i have a kid because the mother made the choice to be a single mother in my eyes. Im 26 offered to marry the girl got a job tried to form a friendly relationship with her family and she refuses to allow me to see the kid unless i take her to court. she claims i owe her 4400 in child support but she wont file the papers agianst me. (DMS) The one clue that i rely on is the fact that she admitted to me that she had slept with her ex boyfriend around the time of her conception. so now im confused im still willing to be a positive part of this kids life but i have to go to court and file all these papers and spend a large amount of money that should be spent on the kid instead of a lawyer. i read what your situation was but i did not read the rest of the forum. any advice that would be nice. but im going to continue to believe that she wants to be a single mother and i just am completely lost on what to do i cant even get her on the phone all she is worried about is money and not on my relationship with the alleged child.

By: Melodious

Melodious — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 19:54:35 +0000

I am reading this blog for the very first time and it actually is bringing tears to my eyes.. I am really struggling with the whole single Mom, divorced, trying to find happiness thing and have felt kinda lost and alone in the way I feel. Then I find this blog, it kinda has brought peace to my mind in that I am not crazy after all.. I am normal and the feelings I have towards my ex and the raising of our children and him being a so rediculous is all part of this thing we call falling in love with the wrong guy and alllowing ourselves to have children with them. I really belived that everything was happening for a reason and maybe I would magically change him into this prince that I dreamt about when I was a lil girl.. Well on June 6th, 2011 I found out that he was not going to turn into a prince and that my dream was offically over as the judge stamped the final divorce papers. I just want to say thank you for this blog and I am excited to continue to read and feel even more encouraged.

By: Lindsay Fuller

Lindsay Fuller — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 16:46:38 +0000

This is weird. Really weird. It’s as if I’m reading my life story. I just stumbled upon your blog via a RT on twitter. So far it’s amazing knowing that someone else has literally gone through what I’m going through right now. ((hugs)) for hanging in there and putting this all out there!

By: finsalscollons

finsalscollons — Sun, 15 Feb 2009 01:04:16 +0000

Yes, you are a single mom by choice. Not for dumping your pathetic ex (well done)but for choosing him to be the father of your child. I see responsible men being rejected every day while jerks get all the woman.

He has always been a jerk (and you have always known how he was but you wanted to delude yourself because he was exciting). So everybody reaps what he/she sows. Now accept the responsibility and move on, instead of blaming other people of your own mistakes. An adult admits his/her mistakes. A child want to blame the world for them.

By: Dawn

Dawn — Sun, 25 Jan 2009 16:30:13 +0000

Remarks of this kind are just a game I call “Drunk Thinking.”

To meet him where his mind is can be a real trick, and admit it, you don’t want to go THERE — instead, look for areas where you both agree. Agree that you chose not to stay married, and say something like, “Yes, it’s true I chose not to be married, you may be right.”

Steer clear of “Drunk Thinking” … keep your eyes on the road of mutual agreements. WARNING: may cause erections.

By: Penelope

Penelope — Sun, 25 Jan 2009 02:56:10 +0000

I’m just going through your archives now and reading some random posts….this one really resonated with me. I hear – often – from my ex husband that it was MY choice to leave, and so I basically have to “suck up” the difficulties that I am faced with. The good news is that he’s NOT a dead-beat dad – he’s a GREAT father to his girls….just not so great as a husband.

I hate the fact that he’s soooo unwilling to take responsibility for his part in the failure of our marriage. Sure, I was the one who decided that I couldn’t do it anymore…but he had a very big hand in helping me to reach that point. I guess that some people tell themselves whatever they have to, in order to be able to sleep at night…

By: The Best of Ms. Single Mama

The Best of Ms. Single Mama — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 05:24:37 +0000

[...] Am I a Single Mother By Choice? [...]

By: Ms. Single Mama

Ms. Single Mama — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:43:10 +0000

Go right ahead!!! I love that one too. Another one of my stunning revelations. : )

By: single mommy

single mommy — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 13:34:42 +0000

“It was his choice to give me no choice”

I’m going to steal this!

By: Single parent social network on Fox | Ms. Single Mama

Single parent social network on Fox | Ms. Single Mama — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 02:04:49 +0000

[...] Say You? Why I am a single mother. « Ms. Single Mama on Was it Really My Choice?E-Harmony’s Matches are Dead Wrong | Ms. Single Mama on E-harmony Dating Review: for the [...]