If you have answered questions about yourself such as, what it is you are really searching for in someone else, then maybe you should be asking yourself what type of people you are meeting. Is there a way to meet certain people who are dating? What kind of person are you to the rest of the world? And, who would be interested in that and, if there is a kind of person who might be interested in that, are there lots of those people in special groups? Maybe adds are one of the best ways.

When i’m meeting women online, i put that sort of thing out there right quick and its relevance. As in… i’m a parent of a sweet little son… this is what he and i are about together… you probably won’t meet him unless i think you’re going to stick around…

Of course this is a different world. Men, i’d guess, run away scared or get turned on fetish-wise (MILFers). The women i meet, initially, seem to take the child living with me as evidence of stability and trustworthiness, and then after they decide they like me (a few weeks) they panic and consider whether they want to adopt my life (as if they need to!?) and take the child living with me as evidence of the need to dump me.

Being a single man with children is completely different to having children as a woman. Not going to argue why, I think it is clear.

The point I would like to make is that your friend was right, I think. A lot of guys need to be pampered on that issue, just like a lot of guys in marriage and in relationships; having children, differently than for women, is not necessarily as easy and an ohhh-whooo-hoooo experience about which they will in no way be confused or uncertain. I say this impersonally.
Just like with money or occupation. A lot of women are searching for a stable career-oriented guy and will scarcely stray from that course. But I would be willing to bet that a lot of them would be more open to at least slight variation on the second or third time than they would have been on the first. I.E. personality goes far, and I think we all know how much we can overlook if we really like or feel a bond with someone. I also think that we all know that unless we get to know the person a bit before, we are quite naturally inclined to misunderstand or hold too impersonally this figure, I.E. first impressions last or, are at least impactive.
I dont even talk about my family until I can see whether the person is really compatible. Not my mother, father, no one. Can you imagine going into some bar and telling a complete stranger about your mother and father when it is clear that there is no sexual interest whatsoever? Just some guy? Hey, I am a single father, Jim… what do you do? Why should sex change that?
I think if you want to go out and find a date, that this relates to your desires and you personally; to no one else. It is not for other people that you are dating, but for youself. this is not a way to say…hey… cheat and hurt people. It is a way to remind you that if you want to get a date, maybe you should consider what makes people tick.
Its like saying… dont put on make up for your first date because this would not be your ‘true self’. The same can be said of clothes and countless other things. Of being in a good mood, or trying to smile though in fact you are down. What… we are supposed to meet people as our naked and natural selves no matter what? Overlook etiquette and all things mannered so as to maintain perfect sincerety!!! But—that is impossible.
If you dont want to talk about your children, dont worry… there is probably plentiful stuff they are conveniently leaving out as well–its called communication.
timing is everything.
Bottom line, your children do not harm them, and if this is the case, than why would you be so considerate as to put yourself out? Dont you remember?–you are the one looking for a date.